WDWDY #77.1: The Humid-Centipede (David Yesterday)

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0:06 - 0:08

Podcasts. There are millions of them.

0:08 - 0:09

Some might say too many.

0:09 - 0:10

I have one already.

0:10 - 0:12

I don't have any because there are enough.

0:12 - 0:20

Politics, business, sport, you name it. There's a podcast about it. And they all ask the big questions and cover the hot topics of the day.

0:20 - 0:24

But nobody is covering the most important topic of all.

0:24 - 0:26

Why is that? Are they scared?

0:26 - 0:28

Too afraid of being censored by the man?

0:28 - 0:33

Possibly, but not us. We're here to ask the only question that matters.

0:33 - 0:37

We try and say it at the same time. Max, what did you do yesterday?

0:37 - 0:44

What did you do yesterday? What did you do yesterday? That's it. All we're interested in is what the guests got up to yesterday. Nothing more.

0:44 - 0:45

Day before yesterday, Max?

0:45 - 0:45

Nope.

0:45 - 0:48

The greatest and most interesting day of your life?

0:48 - 0:52

Unless it was yesterday, we don't want to know about it. I'm Max Rushden.

0:52 - 0:54

And I'm David O'Doherty.

0:54 - 1:07

Welcome to What Did You Do Yesterday? Hello and welcome to Midweek Mayhem. From the people that bring you What Did You Do Yesterday, I'm Max Rushden. Alongside me, David O'Doherty. Welcome, David.

1:07 - 1:11

First time I have ever considered doing the podcast topless.

1:11 - 1:12

Oh, right.

1:12 - 1:13

It's so warm.

1:13 - 1:23

Oh, I thought it was last week's subscription. This week, only fans. We're no longer in this for the entertainment business. We're just here.

1:23 - 1:36

And the mocking we got last week from Kristen Schaal. Firstly, she'd never heard of us. I mean, you told me this was huge in LA. You told me that when you're on the LA subway, everyone's just listening to us.

1:36 - 1:51

She'd never heard of you and you were at her wedding. A mistake we often make is we plug things at the end of the podcast. And so we should say thank you to everybody, the extraordinary

1:51 - 2:00

numbers who have already subscribed for the bonus episode, which is released at the same time as this one. You can see it in your feed. And if you have subscribed, it's there. And if you haven't,

2:00 - 2:13

there's a little padlock. And if you would like to open the sad padlock, you have to go to yesterdaypod.supportingcast.fm or actually on your little app, because I had to subscribe

2:13 - 2:18

to be able to see the comments. So we're also in this. We're no different to anyone else.

2:18 - 2:19

Yeah.

2:19 - 2:30

I'm fully paid up. I love the podcast and I want to hear more of it. And so I'm a subscriber, yesterdaypod.supportingcast.fm. You'll get the ad free. You'll get the bonus episode.

2:30 - 2:42

You'll get the tea towel, which is coming soon. If you sign up for the year and the lottery for when we do normal persons, what did you do yesterday? Even if it's against their will.

2:42 - 2:44

Do you want a terrible admission?

2:44 - 2:44

What's this?

2:44 - 2:45

I haven't signed up yet.

2:45 - 2:47

Why? Because you're just not that into it?

2:47 - 2:59

I don't know if I'm that into it. Yeah. For me, I think I get enough already from a guest. They're just two blowhards thinking they could justify basically 50 minutes to an hour of this.

2:59 - 3:05

Do I need another 50 minutes of that? I'm not sure I do, but I'll think about it. I'll have a think.

3:05 - 3:14

My best friend, Matt Skelding, said, I'm not paying for this. And then he said, you need to make sure to avoid any in-jokes forming in the paid episodes that you mentioned.

3:14 - 3:28

In front of the freeloaders, lest they feel sad and left out. I will be sure to point out if this happens. So actually, it's quite useful having Matt here as a control. If he hears something he doesn't understand, he will be in touch. So he's like our auditor.

3:28 - 3:38

We've got an auditor for what did you do yesterday. But I should say, despite David's concern, yeah, it is worth doing. It's worth doing.

3:38 - 3:40

Yeah, fine. I'll give it a go.

3:40 - 3:41

Yeah, thanks, mate.

3:41 - 3:48

Just read the padlock. The algorithm has been serving me up a new intriguing. They know I'm a bad boy.

3:48 - 3:52

Okay. Of course. Yeah. Like a T-bird. You're like Patsy.

3:52 - 3:56

Who's Patsy? Patsy is the bear from Children in Need.

3:56 - 4:04

That's Pudsey. Patsy is from Grease. You're so well, so well, well, oh, that's who you are.

4:04 - 4:14

Yeah, it would be weird if one of the characters in Grease was Pudsey, the lovable teddy bear from Children in Need,

4:14 - 4:16

just hugging Terry Wogan.

4:16 - 4:19

Yeah, he doesn't say much, does he? Does he have a personality?

4:19 - 4:32

Pudsey? No, notoriously an asshole. Keeps himself to himself. Doesn't talk to the rest of the crew, doesn't know anyone's name, you know, but just turns up and delivers when he's on air. Off camera, absolute fuckwit.

4:32 - 4:42

Yeah, I heard for a while he was on the town with Mandeville, who was one of the two mascots of the London 2012 Olympics.

4:42 - 4:53

Right, okay, yeah. And PK, the Mexico 86 mascot. Three of them were in cahoots, weren't they? Just tearing up the town. They were like Chris Evans and Danny Baker, Gazza.

4:53 - 5:04

My point is this. So I'm getting, in addition to Danny Sandhouse sanding Victorian floors, fights on Ryanair, I'm now getting how to open locks for free.

5:04 - 5:05

Oh really?

5:05 - 5:14

In particular, you know the ones that they have in offices sometimes, which are, it's one to ten on four letters.

5:14 - 5:19

Yeah, yeah, yeah, it's one, two, four, seven, x hash.

5:19 - 5:28

They're a cinch to open. They're an absolute, yeah. You sort of open it as much as you can, and then you test each of the buttons.

5:28 - 5:32

Oh, like cracking a safe with a little ear trumpet.

5:32 - 5:40

Yeah, yeah, yeah, this is it, and I feel it's. Going to come in useful one day when you're trapped inside something, and I'll be able to rescue you.

5:40 - 5:48

Well, hopefully trapped inside something with that specific lock, otherwise not helpful. But I mean, that is a good, when we're thinking about the subscribers.

5:48 - 5:57

It's cheaper than a locksmith call-out fee, that's all I'm saying for that, to open that padlock. Now, there is a big moment of controversy from the Kristen Schaal ep.

5:57 - 5:59

Shit, I know what it is.

5:59 - 6:13

You know what it is, Andy writes, David, I think you forcing Max to spell Jodhpur's, dismissing his effort as though he was a dunce, and then very confidently spelling it wrong, perfectly encapsulates the glorious nonsense of the pod. Jake confidently spelling Jodhpur's.

6:13 - 6:26

Wrong to bait engagement on the new listener drive shakes my head. We're on to you, Jay. I aspire to the confidence of dod spelling Jodhpur's wrong. Dear Max says, hope in San Francisco.

6:26 - 6:35

Are you okay? Are you being bullied? There have already been red flags for me in your relationship with David, given his unending bullying of your use of meals in a box and his utter disregard.

6:35 - 6:49

For your time poverty as a parent. But during the episode with Kristen Schaal, he really outdid himself. His disdain for your correct spelling of the word Jodhpur's, as he gave you the incorrect spelling and then proceeded to gaslight you and berate you for your inability to spell Jodhpur's.

6:49 - 7:01

Which, again, you spell correctly, and he did not, was evidence to me that this is no longer a healthy, supportive relationship. As a devoted pod listener, I feel it's my duty to remind you that.

7:01 - 7:14

In it for life does not mean you have to remain in an abusive relationship. There are those who care about you and have your back at times when you doubt yourself. Please recite, I know how to spell Jodhpur's, and I'm a strong, independent podcaster. Love from Hope in.

7:14 - 7:18

San Francisco. David, over to you.

7:18 - 7:29

I would like to apologize for dismissing you, but I listened back to it as well. I was so confident, I still thought I was right.

7:29 - 7:34

Do you know what I mean? To the point where I put in, like, are there alternative spellings of Jodhpur's?

7:34 - 7:39

Oh, I see, right, you're sticking to your guns. Stick to your guns, you've got to believe in. Yourself.

7:39 - 7:54

No, that was awful. That's a real low point in the podcast. Add to the listeners, I'm sorry, it's an Indian word, and I think purrs means city.

7:54 - 8:04

People don't want this from you. People don't want you trying to, like, you know, now come up with some extra facts about Jodhpur's. Do you know the problem for me is, I've had so many messages about Jodhpur's, I can't see the word anymore.

8:04 - 8:15

I've literally, no, I used to know how to spell Jodhpur's, and now I don't know how to spell Jodhpur's. It's gonna have a huge impact on my life. What if Willie Rushden becomes a jockey? I'll just have to.

8:15 - 8:21

Say trousers. I'll be laughed out of the gymkhana. That's what you've done. That's what you've done to me

8:21 - 8:26

, Max. It was the fact that we'd missed a week while we were migrating onto some new platform.

8:26 - 8:40

Something. I think it was so much expectation, and then when I so confidently - I do love this. Sorry, this is a message from B. E. Murphy, who just said, so glad you're back. I got so desperate I listened to Max's.

8:40 - 8:50

Soccer podcast, which in fairness to it does deal with yesterday, but a very specific aspect of yesterday, which is football matches that took place yesterday.

8:50 - 8:56

Well, actually, we're recording the evening, so it's today. It's what did you do today?

8:56 - 8:56

Yeah, yeah,

8:56 - 9:09

but there were so many games. Yesterday, that my co-host Barry, who I'm being a bit quiet because he's asleep still, he didn't the apartment. I mean, he could have left the apartment, but he just sat on a chair watching.

9:09 - 9:23

The Lincoln Lawyer and watching football. Well, thanks for listening to that. Yeah, and he says I have to say that you both handled Kristen Schaal's visit to the gynaecologist disappointingly well. Back in series one, that would have gone very differently and possibly ended in a lawsuit or.

9:23 - 9:38

Cancellation. Oh, we don't want to get good at this, David. Much better Vittorio's bonk. When we— I was trying to be really cool about the smear test. I was like, this is good. It's good people.

9:38 - 9:50

Having this conversation. We need to have these. Men need to have these conversations. That's what I was thinking in my mind. I was like, men need to have these conversations. What happens had it been. The first series? I'd have said, was it a good smear test?

9:50 - 9:55

I would have said, yeah, what was your score? What did you get out of 100 for it?

9:55 - 10:09

Nadim, a friend of mine, says ahead of today's England match, quick. Question, if I may, Max, are you Emma Raducanu's new boyfriend? John Friend seems to be an alien you might use. Yeah, there's another generic man. I would say

10:09 - 10:10

John Friend spent

10:10 - 10:15

— I'm not spelling. Anything to you, David. It's too risky.

10:15 - 10:30

Oh yeah, here we go. John Friend. Oh yeah, there you are. Wow, this is awful. On top of Mrs. Rushden being stuck in Australia with two little diseased lads and you,

10:30 - 10:33

I'm stepping out with Emma Raducanu.

10:33 - 10:46

British tennis's next hope. I know. Here's a great message from Rebecca. Dear Max, Dod and producing team, I feel compelled to finally write in as the degree to which the pod is becoming the center of.

10:46 - 10:54

My universe, or more specifically Max's, even though I've never met him, is now getting weird. I've been listening to the podcast for 18 months, and I love it, but every now and then the Venn.

10:54 - 11:03

Diagram of my life and Max's life overlaps a bit more, and then a bit more. My first and main connection to Max is via my husband Steve, who is now a photographer himself. Used to work for.

11:03 - 11:13

Martin Parr in the studio next door to Max's flat. Hello, Steve. Yeah, for many years it was in fact Steve who did Max's printing.

11:13 - 11:18

Sorry, now it's Dave, the physical therapist to the 2007 taekwondo.

11:18 - 11:23

Yeah, Dave does it, and Frank and Janet do it now, but it was Steve.

11:23 - 11:33

Or Tom, or I mean, Louis and Jenny did most of it, but anyway, Steve did a lot of it. It was often a topic of conversation over dinner in the evening that once again the bloke who presents soccer AM

11:33 - 11:45

had knocked on the door and asked Steve to print something, and wasn't it strange that given his level of success, he still did not own a printer? I did; I just hadn't plugged it into the.

11:45 - 11:54

Wi-Fi. We also often discuss whether Max had anything to do in the week, given that he only seemed to work on weekends at the time. No, just Friday, Saturday morning. I never met Max properly.

11:54 - 12:03

But I do have a memory of seeing him during the Soccer AM Glory Years at the front door in a dressing gown one weekday morning. Sounds about right; I wouldn't have been in a dressing gown, not.

12:03 - 12:12

It would have been a T-shirt and pants. Perhaps I'm a freelance food and drink journalist. I also work for The Guardian, and after a couple of years after Steve left Martin's and ceased to be Max's.

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