0:06 - 0:13
Podcasts, there are millions of them.
0:13 - 0:18
Some might say too many.
0:18 - 0:22
I have one already.
0:22 - 0:24
I don’t have any because there are enough.
0:24 - 0:30
Politics, business, sport, you name it, there’s a podcast about it.
0:30 - 0:34
But nobody is covering the most important topic of all.
0:34 - 0:37
Why is that? Are they scared?
0:37 - 0:40
Too afraid of being censored by the man?
0:40 - 0:45
Possibly. But not us. We're here to ask the only question that matters.
0:45 - 0:48
We try and say it at the same time, Max. What did you do yesterday?
0:48 - 0:55
What did you do yesterday? What did you do yesterday? That's it. All we're interested in is what the guests got up to yesterday. Nothing more.
0:55 - 0:56
Day before yesterday, Max?
0:57 - 0:59
The greatest and most interesting... Day of your life?
0:59 - 1:04
Unless it was yesterday, we don't want to know about it. I'm Max Rushden.
1:04 - 1:06
And I'm David O'Doherty.
1:06 - 1:16
Welcome to What Did You Do Yesterday? Hello and welcome to Midweek Mayhem. From the people that bring you What Did You Do Yesterday, my name's Max Rushden.
1:16 - 1:23
Alongside me, David O'Doherty on this brand new, very similar journey.
1:23 - 1:34
Yeah. There are two paths in the forest. Will you take... Will you take the one you normally take or the very similar one that's just beside it?
1:34 - 1:49
But the similar one, because this is the first one that if you've signed up, you will also get... It's my yesterday today, but you'll also get David's yesterday. And you'll get the merch and the live streams and the chance to be a yesterdayer yourself.
1:49 - 1:59
You are in it for life. No parole. Yesterdaypod.com. No, no, no, no, no, not .com. So that just rolls off the tongue, doesn't it? Why don't we do .com? That would really...
1:59 - 2:10
Everyone knows that one. Yesterday.supportingcast.fm. Everybody sign up, please. We would appreciate it. What else do we do in that? Yeah, the lottery, the live streams, ad-free. Tea towel.
2:10 - 2:23
Tea towel early release. Yeah, there we go. Although early release in this podcast sounds like it could be for the bath. And that feels like... Do you want to subscribe for an early release?
2:23 - 2:37
I mean, for me, the promise is really of an episode where we can... I mean, not that... When we record these, I'm thinking everyone's going to be listening to this, but we can really nerd it up in those.
2:37 - 2:48
I mean, this is coming from someone who's been playing a cheese game for two years that we could really do weird stuff that we're into in the other one.
2:48 - 2:54
And the exciting news for me is Mars Bar and David have sanctioned a version of Think of a Thing, which will go...
2:54 - 3:04
There's too many guns. Which will go... I'm very excited about that. I just have to think of a thing before we record that episode.
3:04 - 3:15
Now, David, it's a while since we did the David Baddiel episode, but that's the last one that came out. And people, let's face it, it was an absolute, an all-timer. Gemma says, I loved this episode.
3:15 - 3:29
I listened while running this morning. The image of David Baddiel's head poking out the top of a barrel in his garden had me laughing so much. I had to stop because I couldn't breathe properly. Kyle says, I don't know if anything on this earth could prepare you for the barrel discussion.
3:29 - 3:38
And I love this. Andrew actually put a bit of transcript down. DOD, David Baddiel, how do you get out of the box?
3:38 - 3:45
Max, good question. And Andrew writes, maybe my favorite Max DOD exchange yet. In it for life.
3:45 - 3:58
There was also the hammock, extensive hammock discussion pre-barrel to the point where, yes, he raised the fact that maybe we talked about the hammock too much.
3:59 - 4:01
I think we've covered hammocks.
4:01 - 4:13
I'm interested in you, the listeners. Has anyone got any hammock anecdotes? Was anyone listening thinking they haven't really, you know, covered the essential hammock news that I think?
4:13 - 4:25
I can't believe they've done 25 minutes on hammocks and they missed the most important part. Petra says, I'm Maltese. And when I lived in Malta, my neighbor was the Archbishop of Malta.
4:25 - 4:28
I love this. Whatever happens now.
4:28 - 4:35
I used to on occasion see His Excellency on his balcony in his underwear as he watched the sunrise.
4:35 - 4:50
Oh, this was if David Baddiel's house had in fact been in St. Peter's Square in the Vatican City and he had come out in the morning.
4:50 - 4:58
Yes, I remember now in his undies to see the Pope standing next door. Wow. His Excellency greeting the Maltese dawn.
4:58 - 5:02
Would the Archbishop of Malta be in pants but have the big hat on?
5:02 - 5:10
Great question. I'm imagining they're a little red sort of suede pants. You know the way the Pope has those little shoes?
5:11 - 5:12
They're leather.
5:12 - 5:20
He's in these red suede pants. The Archbishop of Malta wears red suede Y-fronts and his big triangle hat on.
5:20 - 5:32
If this was your football show now, it would be, could someone get me a picture of the Archbishop of Malta's pants and within 10 minutes. That's someone from the Laundrette around the corner would have.
5:32 - 5:38
Colonel Getafe says, I've just had a text from my wife who said, David Baddiel got tennis elbow from giving blood.
5:38 - 5:53
I thought I was going insane. I feel seen because he also got tennis elbow from, I like the image of this guy with a needle in David's elbow and just wanging on about Arsenal's form from set pieces for hours and hours.
5:53 - 5:59
All the blood is drained out of David Baddiel. He's got a massive needle. He's just pulled out all the blood.
6:00 - 6:04
He's just a little bit too polite to say, could you take the needle out, please?
6:04 - 6:22
Also that episode, it's one of my favorite things about this podcast because David Baddiel clearly had much more interesting tales to tell us, such as relinquishing his US citizenship at the embassy in Bulgaria,
6:22 - 6:31
I think where it was. But instead, we just wanted to hear about him in a barrel more. Forget that.
6:31 - 7:03
Dan says, dear Max and DOD. I was just listening to your pod with David Baddiel. I've always been a fan of his way back to the cultural phenomenon that was Newman and Baddiel. However this morning while walking through the park on my usual constitutional. On the outside to passers by I would have seemed calm, serene, at one with nature. On the inside I'm screaming answer the fucking questions Baddiel. What time did you get out of bed in the morning? Is David Baddiel the first to completely evade the question, maybe you both should be more Paxman after all. Also asking if your listeners are interested in nitty gritty. I mean, has he even listened to the pod before?
7:03 - 7:15
Nitty gritty is our bread and butter. In it for life. Everything is entertainment. All about the nitty gritty. Yeah, it is a failure of mine, I guess, to have not really pushed down journalistically when he woke up.
7:16 - 7:17
I'm sorry about that.
7:17 - 7:32
We bash against the limitations of having, you know, well, listeners, I shut my eyes there for a second and I heard a sound which I thought was Max blowing snot out through his nose like a footballer mid-game.
7:32 - 7:34
I was pulling a blind down.
7:34 - 7:44
He was shutting a blind. As this podcast becomes even more of a phenomenon and we have requests from bigger people to go on it,
7:44 - 7:57
you come to a sort of the legendary appearance of De Niro on off-menu type situation where he clearly has no idea what he's going on, but everyone's told him he's a good thing to go on it.
7:57 - 8:01
So they say, what's your favorite food in New York? And he says, whatever's good, whatever's good.
8:01 - 8:14
That is such a brilliant moment where you can imagine for James and Ed, they're just like heart sinking, but it is Robert De Niro. So you're just like, the thing is, if he came on this, I think I'd pin him down.
8:14 - 8:20
You know, I'm not letting him get away with it going, I don't know, I can't remember yesterday. I'm like, this is the format, Robert.
8:20 - 8:21
You say that.
8:21 - 8:22
I'd be tough with De Niro.
8:22 - 8:26
Elton ran a merry dance around us. Come on, we did our best.
8:26 - 8:40
I don't think he did. I think I really started. I stuck him to task, Elton. I think he's still thinking about it now going, that's the toughest interview. The toughest but most respectful interview I've ever had. Here is a lovely email from Hayley on the Isle of Wight.
8:40 - 8:51
Dear whole of the What Did You Do crew, I've been a listener from the start. I first heard Max on Parenting Hell and I absolutely loved him. Thanks so much. This is where someone on Reddit goes, hi, Max. This is from you. He sounded like such a normal guy.
8:51 - 9:01
And when he mentioned he was going to be on a podcast with DOD, I figured I'd have to listen. Here I am two years later, definitely in it for life. No parole. I added that bit in.
9:01 - 9:11
I love hearing about how mundane some celebrities are. I enjoy all the talk about actual shit, how Max is coping on five hours of broken sleep and David is just having a wonderful life with his 18 bikes and the Helen Copter.
9:11 - 9:23
Anyway, the reason I've emailed in is because my husband is great at puns. It's almost like a superpower, albeit a crap one. I asked him for alternative names for the Soctopus and he fired back these suggestions within a minute.
9:23 - 9:33
Listeners, the Soctopus is the item that I was looking for that hangs multiple. It hangs multiple pieces of small laundry in the placement and then on the Helen Copter.
9:33 - 9:46
And now we're using an overhang on the outdoors, so we therefore can't just hang stuff on conventional washing lines or, as we did in the old place, on one of those hoisty hoists like you're a sailor on a ship.
9:46 - 9:57
Yeah, and now we've got merch. If we went straight into this, it might absolutely clean up. Anyway, within a minute, he came up with Drinosaurus, a runaway.
9:57 - 10:00
Hang on. I will critique each one.
10:00 - 10:13
Only problem with the Drinosaurus is I'm imagining one single, you know, it's a huge thing that takes up most of the garden with the unicorn coming off the front of it with just one sock on the end of it.
10:13 - 10:17
But how does it dry that sock? Yeah. A rang-a-hang?
10:17 - 10:21
Whoa, that's much better because, and I'm seeing it gripping.
10:21 - 10:22
One arm gripping.
10:22 - 10:26
Oh, one arm. And then stuff hanging from all of the other bits.
10:26 - 10:29
Maybe grips from the tail and then you can get four socks.
10:29 - 10:31
And if you put one on the head, five.
10:31 - 10:46
Well, also some of those small sort of proboscis monkeys have willies as well. I think quite a lot of monkeys have willies. Half of them. Approximately half of them have willies. And so you could hang something else from that there too.
10:46 - 10:49
That's true. That is true. Jelly swish.
10:49 - 10:56
Oh, jelly swish. Right. Yeah. Jelly fish swish. What's swish? You don't hang things.
10:56 - 10:58
That's true. Okay. Rejected. Butter dry.
10:58 - 11:00
Oh, like a butterfly.
11:00 - 11:03
Oh, butterfly. Right. I see. Okay.
11:03 - 11:06
This guy is a machine. Hayley, this guy.
11:06 - 11:09
Yeah. The drying mantis.
11:09 - 11:17
So that's useful because it's a spider and therefore it's got six legs.
11:17 - 11:18
Is a praying mantis a spider?
11:18 - 11:28
Oh, no, it's not. A praying mantis is called a praying mantis because it looks like it's kneeling and praying. It's sort of like a giant grasshopper, isn't it? It's still good. I still like it.
11:29 - 11:30
Hang to lope.
11:30 - 11:32
Now we're running out now.
11:32 - 11:34
And washing lion.
11:34 - 11:37
Oh, the washing lion is really good.
11:37 - 11:38
Yeah. Done well.
11:38 - 11:52
The Isle of Wight. Unbelievable. My main memory of it, of course, is getting lost on the way to the stage, opening the door and there being a swimming pool in front of me with children, me holding the keyboard and children having a swimming class.
11:52 - 12:06
Claire Neve writes, dear DOD and generic man three. I felt compelled to write in following the Phil Elis episode and the unforgettable discussion about Moomins being repurposed as a butt plug. Several weeks later, the conversation had apparently lodged itself far deeper in my subconscious than I realized.
12:06 - 12:20
One morning, one morning I woke up to find my husband looking at me with a mixture of concern, confusion, what I can only describe as disappointment. What on earth were you dreaming about? He asked. Still half asleep. I had absolutely no idea what he meant.
12:20 - 12:28
According to him, moments earlier, I'd been mumbling in my sleep. When pressed for details, he informed me that my exact words had been, no, not the Moomin.
12:28 - 12:44
I have no recollection whatsoever of this dream, none. I can only assume that somewhere in the darkest recesses of my sleeping mind, a tiny Scandinavian troll was facing a fate I simply could not allow.
12:44 - 12:52
Thank you for permanently altering my subconscious. My husband now believes I spend my nights defending Moomins from unspeakable indignities.
12:52 - 13:07
Please pass my apologies to Moomin Mama, Moomin Papa, and the wider Moomin community. Of course, this only adds to the long list that proves that what did you do yesterday is the center of the universe, and despite my sleep-induced distress, I am still in it for life. Claire. Thank you, Claire.
13:07 - 13:17
Poor, not the Moomin. To me, that implies there's a line of lovable characters that are, you know, in turn awaiting their fate.
13:17 - 13:24
Claire is reacting to each, you know, like, in some way, the Smurf is better, I guess, because they're smaller.
13:24 - 13:38
Well, she's had a whole load of things in her head, but finally she's like, that's Claire's dream. Ange in Melbourne. Ange Postacoglu, here's hoping. Hi, Max, Mars Bar and DOD. Newbie listener here.
13:38 - 13:52
I went to your Good Friday Live podcast in Melbourne, expecting a comedy gig. Was very confused sitting in the third row. Long time fan of DOD, though. I'd seen his show the night before. I had no idea who Max was, but after binging a few episodes, you now feel like an old friend whose dulcet tones are craved daily by my ears.
13:52 - 14:05
Anyway, I'm currently on holiday in Milan and saw a smooth-nosed train today. My immediate thought was not, that's a nice train, but rather... That would fit on the butt nicely. A sentence I would previously consider medically and socially alarming.
14:05 - 14:14
I've now accepted that my internal monologue is partially narrated by this podcast. Can't wait to see a turtle next. Keep up the great work in It For Life and in Melbourne. Thank you, Ange.
14:14 - 14:20
What was the turtle? Well, the turtle that comes to mind is Stevie's Turtle with the...
14:20 - 14:22
Stevie's Turtle with the vibrator.
14:22 - 14:27
It's a terrible version of Cluedo. Stevie's Turtle with the vibrator in the conservatory.
14:28 - 14:39
Oh, that would be good. Or what did you do yesterday? Cluedo, where the murder weapons are, you know, the soctopus, the vibrator, the bath. Oh God.
14:39 - 14:40
The Moomin.
14:40 - 14:48
The Moomin. Nish Kumar with the Moomin in the kitchen.
15:08 - 15:22
The David Squires guess, Christian in Derby says, was the father of the Oxford fan Desmond Morris. He died recently, and in 1978, he was elected vice chairman of Oxford United Football Club.
15:22 - 15:32
He lived with his son and family in Ireland, while a director of the club, he designed its ox head badge based on a Minoan-style bull's head, which remains in use to this day.
15:32 - 15:36
Hang on, is this Desmond Morris, the groundbreaking sociologist?
15:36 - 15:41
Was he a sociologist? Yes. Also famous for having a comb-over, I presume.
15:41 - 15:42
Did he have a comb-over?
15:42 - 15:53
This could be a good guess. The David Squires quiz, to which I sort of have kind of forgotten who we're searching for, but it's someone in Ireland whose dad was an Oxford fan. It's amazing.
15:53 - 16:05
Desmond Morris, also most famous because our school library had a copy of Man Watching, which was one of his groundbreaking anthropologically sociological books.
16:05 - 16:18
It had a picture of... It had a picture of a nude mum and dad in it. Yeah, you would not believe the amount of thumbs that had thumbed to that page in an all-boys school.
16:18 - 16:31
One of the previous owners of my Tricolore French book had rubbed out the blouse that Yvette was wearing and drawn some incredible boobs. So when I turned the page, I could not stop laughing that I got sent out of class.
16:31 - 16:41
And I didn't want to show what had happened to my Tricolore book. But Yvette, it was a moment of awakening for me Producer Will, was it Desmond Morris?
16:41 - 16:48
The answer is correct, Desmond Morris.
16:48 - 16:53
Wow! What a day! Oh my goodness!
16:53 - 16:55
It's amazing.
16:55 - 17:05
Because a lot of the correspondence about this from Squires has been like, give up lads, there's no point, no one is ever going to get us. But holy cow!
17:05 - 17:10
Do you know, I always feel a bit sad when a quiz ends.
17:11 - 17:21
The journey of the quiz is so wonderful and also so painful. But that is, that's great news. Because I think Mars Bar said we'd never ever get, no one would ever ever get it. And there we are.
17:21 - 17:36
I do feel bad that, because I presume this wasn't going to be right. So I just mentioned the thing about the only nudes in the school library. And now that is forever the legacy of Desmond Morris on this podcast.
17:36 - 17:49
But hey, don't worry, there's still the cucumbers at the Piedmontese. Jill says, Hi, Yesterday's Men. In our hearts today and forever. Now to business. I would like to submit actor Vince Colosimo as my guest for the Piedmontese mystery person.
17:49 - 18:00
I don't know. Without giving it away. The relevant experience on my CV is working at the Westgarth Cinema, oh, my local cinema, for many years back in the day where he was a regular.
18:00 - 18:07
And now my close proximity to the other Piedmontese on Bell Street. Pieds is definitely showbiz in it for life, Jill.
18:07 - 18:17
It's not correct. Although, interesting, my friend Dave Colosimo is also a Colosimo, but I don't know if he's related to Vince, but that is not the person that was giving him lifts in the late 80s, early 90s.
18:17 - 18:26
So that quiz is still alive. It's always good to do three quizzes in a row, which comes first. They're just normal countries, and then cheese at the end.
18:26 - 18:33
Cheese at the end. No, wait, because the end needs to bleed seamlessly into the other yesterday.
18:33 - 18:39
Just do cheese now. I'm not saying we're, killing the redux of normal countries.
18:39 - 18:48
No, what you could do is, you could do the yesterday, then do the cheese, and then go, oh, what did you do yesterday? What do you think that doesn't work?
18:48 - 19:02
It seemed nicer that you would tell us about your yesterday, and then you would go, and then I went to sleep. Do you know what I'm interested in, David? What did you do yesterday? As opposed to, do you know what I'm interested in? What was the fifth cheese at the O'Doherty Sheridan Family Quiz?
19:02 - 19:10
Oh, I'll tell you what, what we'll do is, we'll do normal countries and cheese right now. We'll never do five quizzes, in a row again.
19:10 - 19:12
This is so many quizzes.
19:12 - 19:16
Okay, they're just normal countries, Redux. Okay.
19:16 - 19:28
I am the one and only. What country could I be? I am the one and only. Where in the world could our listeners be?
19:28 - 19:46
Previous guesses, Northern Marianas Islands, Lesotho, Malawi, Suriname, South Sudan, Sao Tama and Principe, Liechtenstein, Montenegro, correct, Guyana, Curaçao, Andorra.
19:46 - 19:59
Joe says, Hi Max, D.O.D., and producers Michael and or Will. Love the show, fan of all your podcasts. Can't really think of anything funny to write, assume this may slip through to the keeper, but I've got a guess for They're Just Normal Countries version two, or whatever this quiz is called.
19:59 - 20:10
Given last week's guess at Curaçao had only two listens, it got me thinking about my current over 35s teammate at Williamstown SC, who played a few, two nationals for a tiny Caribbean nation. So my guess is Montserrat.
20:11 - 20:22
Keep up the great work, looking forward to the World Cup pods, everything is showbiz, in it for life and all that. Joe, producer Will, is Montserrat a normal country? Or how many listens in Montserrat?
20:23 - 20:28
Seven, whoa! Enormous, we could fill a minibus, live show in a reno espace.
20:28 - 20:33
Curaçao is the only normal country to be in the World Cup, I would imagine.
20:33 - 20:35
But it's not a normal country because it had two listens.
20:35 - 20:46
Oh yeah, it did. Okay, fine, fine, fine. We'll do the fastest cheese ever so we can get to the yesterday, Max. Come on.
20:46 - 21:13
Five. Four. Three. Two. One. I've got cheese! This is cheese.
21:13 - 21:30
This is from Libby, hi DOD, Max and Mars.
21:30 - 21:45
Thanks for keeping me entertained in the nights while feeding my baby, though she wasn't best pleased about how much I wobbled my boobs with lols at the Bret McKenzie episode. Anyway, how Benny Hill. Anyway, two things. Please can I see if Charruz is on the cheese board. Brie.
21:45 - 21:46
Bing, bing, bing.
21:46 - 21:48
Chartreuse. Caerphilly.
21:48 - 21:50
Bing, bing, bing.
21:50 - 21:51
Cashel Blue.
21:51 - 21:52
Bing, bing, bing.
21:52 - 21:53
Cheesestrings.
21:53 - 21:54
Bing, bing, bing.
21:54 - 21:56
That's it. All the quizzes done.
21:56 - 21:58
Thank you, everybody, for sticking with the quizzes.
21:58 - 22:05
Max, I, however, have one question for you. What did you do yesterday?
22:05 - 22:10
Oh, dear. I understand that this podcast is mainly for the listeners.
22:10 - 22:13
But I know that Jamie listens to this podcast.
22:13 - 22:14
And I am in Los Angeles.
22:14 - 22:16
Yeah, we haven't covered this.
22:16 - 22:17
Working on the World Cup.
22:17 - 22:22
This is fascinating. This is going to be a totally different yesterday to normal.
22:22 - 22:24
It is. It is. But I know that Jamie will hear this.
22:25 - 22:27
And I know that she is at home with two children.
22:28 - 22:32
One or both of them have hand, foot, and mouth. It's an absolute fucking disaster.
22:32 - 22:33
What is that?
22:33 - 22:43
It's not like foot and mouth where you have to round up all the children. And cull them like badgers. But it is bad. And it means they don't sleep.
22:43 - 22:56
And the timing from Ian and Willie, I would say, is imperfect. You could have got this while I was in town. Even while Jamie was away, it would have been better. So by the time Jamie listens to this, which will be next week, I hope everything is okay.
22:56 - 22:59
And I love you dearly. But I can't lie about my yesterday.
23:00 - 23:02
I can't lie about my yesterday.
23:02 - 23:09
I woke up and hired a convertible with Don Henley from the Eagles. And we sat off to visit the boys of summer.
23:09 - 23:19
My day is incredibly boring. But, like, I wasn't at home. That is the point I'm making. I know Jamie knows I wasn't at home. It's 6.22 a.m. I wake up. I lie in bed.
23:19 - 23:27
I try and go back to sleep. I'm over jet lag. But at the moment, my weekend radio shows are 2 till 5 a.m. I've managed to make them worse hours.
23:27 - 23:30
So 2 till 5, so you've slept for...
23:30 - 23:39
No, because this was Monday. And so my radio shows are Friday night into Saturday, Saturday night into Sunday. I sort of go to bed. I go to bed at 9, get up at half past 1, do 2 till 5.
23:39 - 23:53
But, you know, I can go to bed because there's no children here. So I'm a bit groggy still. I do the Wordle. I post a reel to Instagram. I'm currently living with Barry Glendenning. He's in the apartment next door. It's sort of odd couple vibes of the videos.
23:53 - 24:08
I'm pretty consistent in mood, whereas Barry can be grumpy or happy. The perfect time to film him is where he's grumpy enough that he's grumpy in the video, but not so grumpy. He tells me to leave in uncertain terms. And never wants to speak to me again.
24:08 - 24:15
So I've been consuming some of your content because one or other of the two of you have been posting it.
24:15 - 24:30
And I do enjoy, like, I bet I'm not alone here among the listeners in thinking the most annoying thing you can have in a housemate is someone who is always temperamentally on the same level.
24:30 - 24:40
You know what I mean? Who's just like, ah, well, shall we go for a little walk or whatever? Shall we do a dance? Barry, do you want to learn a TikTok dance? You know, this sort of thing.
24:40 - 24:53
Now, I'm not saying I despair for the relationship because there is another four weeks of the World Cup to go. But I did see him post about how annoyingly loud you are at eating apples.
24:53 - 25:01
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Which I think is harsh. Although producer Joel also sort of backed him up that I am a loud apple eater.
25:01 - 25:13
But I think if that's as bad as it is, as I pointed out to Barry, like he, he will happily just belch at 4.5 on the Richter scale and not even say, sorry about that, or pardon me.
25:13 - 25:24
And I would say that is worse than eating an apple. I would say we're not designed to live together, but we are living together. The previous video, he had caught me in the gym lifting those tiny weights that are like weights for hamsters.
25:24 - 25:33
But all the comments were that he had a massive bogey up his nose. So the video that I'm posting is just checking up his nose to see if he has a giant bogey. It's good stuff.
25:33 - 25:48
Yeah, I'd be interested in one of our scientist listeners is it possible that some people eat apples louder than others? As in, does your mouth effectively act like in a pipe organ as a huge echo chamber?
25:48 - 25:51
Right, I see. He's saying I've got a mouth like the Royal Albert Hall.
25:51 - 26:00
Yeah. With good acoustics. With an echo. So it's like, and then you hear like, as it bounces around your palate.
26:00 - 26:12
Anyway, I'm up. I go and get coffee. It's 3 a.m. in Melbourne. Willie Rushden has hand, foot, and mouth. He's not sleeping. The blisters are bursting. Is that good or bad? I don't know. Jamie isn't sleeping. I can't help.
26:12 - 26:22
This sounds like Hamnet, except in that film, Shakespeare was in London writing these very successful plays, whereas you're doing a podcast in LA.
26:22 - 26:35
So I'm sitting in a cafe. I'm getting those messages. And then the bosses are happy because Guardian Football Weekly Daily has moved above the rest is politics in the charts, right? So I try and think of a way to post this, but I can't do that without looking like a twat.
26:36 - 26:47
So then I don't post. I just let it hang there. The last two days, I haven't really been anywhere. So I go for a walk and I ring my agent for no sort of boring admin reasons.
26:47 - 26:52
It's 9am. It's Spain versus Cape Verde. So that's where the football begins.
26:52 - 26:59
So hang on. I need some basics here. I'm imagining you're in a service department on the side of a freeway because this is LA.
26:59 - 27:01
We're on Sunset Boulevard.
27:01 - 27:03
You're not. Are you really?
27:03 - 27:16
Yeah, yeah, yeah. So what's that really? Famous hotel is like opposite us. The Viper Room is close. It's West Hollywood. I mean, I know nothing about this place. And I know the walk to the studio and, you know, that's about, and the cafe over the road.
27:16 - 27:29
I haven't really been anywhere because LA is enormous and I've always got to get back for the game, which is an hour after the other one's finished. So this is not a complaint. I'm having a nice time, of course. So Spain, Cape Verde, it's 9am.
27:29 - 27:42
I watch the first half in my room with a yogurt and banana and some excellent Trader Joe's granola. And that's the last banana. But that's okay. Cause I think Barry's not really eating the bananas. He doesn't mind me eating bananas. I'm a quiet banana eater.
27:42 - 27:48
Is this full student vibes? Are you writing your name on things? Have you got a Sharpie and you've written Max on a banana?
27:48 - 28:01
No, it's very communal actually. So there's us, there's producer Joel, there's the social media producers, Rory and Matt, or the video editor and social media producers. So we're sort of on a rotation of who's going to cook the big dinner. We'll get onto who cooked dinner last night.
28:01 - 28:08
I'm imagining a huge box. I'm imagining the biggest box you've ever seen. I've never seen what it's Max's doing, a coffin.
28:08 - 28:22
For the second half, I go and watch it on the treadmill. I walk uphill fast up the treadmill and watch the second half of Spain, Cape Verde. And it's a draw. It's a really great result. I messaged both our babysitters to see if they could just move in and be au pairs.
28:22 - 28:26
It's three in the morning in Melbourne, but I'm just trying to think, what can I do?
28:26 - 28:37
So Ireland didn't qualify for the World Cup. We nearly did. But there is one born and bred Irish guy in the World Cup.
28:37 - 28:47
And I am in Dublin 8 right now. Just across the canal is Crumlin, where Pico Lopez lives.
28:47 - 28:56
And he is at the age of 32. I think he got an email from the manager of the Cape Verde team.
28:56 - 29:06
He got a message on LinkedIn in Portuguese saying, can you come and join Cape Verde? And he ignored it because he thought he didn't understand it or he thought it was a joke. And then they replied like a year later in English. And he went, oh yeah.
29:06 - 29:18
And there he is marshalling this defence in a massive stadium, I think in Atlanta, having the game of his life against Spain at the World Cup. It's unbelievable. Like it's such an amazing story.
29:18 - 29:32
The sports shops up the street in the front window of it is the Brazil kit, you know, the Argentina kit, the France kit and the Cape Verde kit as the four kits that the people of Ireland may be interested in buying.
29:32 - 29:47
So look, Sid Lowe, our Spanish football correspondent, has been at the game. And so I messaged him to say, can he just do like five minutes to say, Sid was at the game, how was it? He's writing his match report. I don't even have blue ticks. So I can't really go anywhere because if he says now, I've got to come back and record it.
29:47 - 29:59
So I go over the road and get a cortado. And those have improved in the last few days because I've got them to make them shorter and shorter and shorter. They're sort of getting on board now. I get producer Joel, a nice Americano. Anyway, we wait for Sid, nothing from Sid.
29:59 - 30:05
It's Belgium v. Egypt. I'm back in the gym. I'm going to lift tiny weights for the first half of Belgium.
30:05 - 30:14
Do you ever need, you know that I can do a variety of accents. Do you ever need me to pretend to have been from a specific place?
30:14 - 30:17
That would be really good. At a specific match.
30:17 - 30:19
I could be Belgian, no matter.
30:19 - 30:26
Okay, let's go to our Belgian correspondent, David van der Doherty.
30:26 - 30:29
It was a game of two halves.
30:29 - 30:32
It's definitely our Italian correspondent.
30:32 - 30:39
The first half, yeah, all I know about Belgium the Belgian accent is that the Frenchies laugh at their accents.
30:39 - 30:42
So it's not just their French accent.
30:42 - 30:52
I was trying to do something a little bit weird. It was the introduction of Lukaku in the second half that opened the game like an oyster.
30:52 - 30:53
That's pretty good.
30:54 - 31:07
Okay, so I watched the first half those tiny weights. Then I go and get my salt. Oil and pepper from Matt's room because I'm making eggs and avocado on toast, so I want salt, pepper and oil.
31:07 - 31:16
He's used them to make a chicken karai, which we'll eat later. We're still waiting for Sid. He's really ghosting me, so I can't go anywhere. But it's okay. Egypt are playing quite well against Belgium.
31:16 - 31:26
I get blue ticks from Sid. It's exciting. Barry returns with a big shop. He's making a chili for tomorrow night, which is good because we have three very ripe avocados, so I can make a guacamole.
31:26 - 31:33
That's today. I film him cutting up a chili. He doesn't like it. He's cutting the chili skin side up and it looks like the knife might slip.
31:33 - 31:47
When I say, do you want some advice? He says, mind your own business. And he doesn't like it. And then I say, should I get the big pan? And he says, mind your own business. And then he can't find the big pan, so a minute later, he has to come in saying, where's the big pan? I'm very happy about that.
31:47 - 31:53
Shit. This is a lot, though, for week one of a five and a half week tournament. Where is this going?
31:53 - 32:05
Yeah. I have a quick shower. I get on FaceTime with Jamie and Ian and Willie and Sid, two blue ticks. He wants to record a thing, so I have to hang up on the family, which is good. I chat to Sid for five minutes. He's had a good time.
32:05 - 32:18
I eat an apple and Barry films it. He accuses me of eating it more quietly than I normally eat an apple. I chat to the family again. Jamie is tired and says, when I get back, we can get divorced. So that's...
32:18 - 32:29
And you say, sorry, Jamie, let me just cut across you there. I have to talk to Lars Sivertsen, who is at Ecuadoria against Bolivia.
32:29 - 32:41
What's this? It's Saudi Arabia versus Uruguay I'm watching this and producer Joel's in them. I've got some corn. At halftime, I need to go and re-record some lines for a secret project I'm involved in with Cambridge United.
32:41 - 32:48
But by now, by the time this goes out, maybe they'll have released the kits. But anyway, hopefully that's not a massive spoiler.
32:48 - 32:55
You know, Cambridge's great rivals are Oxford, of course. And the Oxford logo was designed by Desmond Morris.
32:55 - 33:00
Is that right? Yeah, basically our rivals are actually Peterborough.
33:00 - 33:12
But I'm interested to learn that. I didn't know that about Desmond Morris. Now I get an email saying I need to update my payment card for my PayPal, but I can't log into my PayPal because when I was on a purge of Google Docs, I deleted
33:12 - 33:17
the one which was all my passwords. So I say, forgot password. It emails me a code.
33:17 - 33:28
So I type in the code. Then it says, can you scan your passport? But it won't, for some reason, the lighting's not right to scan. I have to come upstairs to get my passport and scan that. And then it says, we'll text
33:28 - 33:41
you, but that's on my British phone, which doesn't have any charge. So I give up. I've spent 20 minutes trying to update my PayPal card and I can't do it. But I don't know what comes out of PayPal, but something will come out of PayPal, which now no longer can come out of PayPal. And that's annoying.
33:41 - 33:55
I had a curious one of those recently. I was updating my social services card in Ireland and you could do it over an app. And it was like, go up to your passport with the phone and just sort of hold it against it.
33:55 - 33:57
On the top of the passport.
33:57 - 34:00
Yeah. What is that? Some sort of vibes going through your phone?
34:00 - 34:05
Yeah, it's a passport vibes. So I did that and they were fine with it, but they wouldn't let me have the picture of my passport.
34:05 - 34:19
It was very upsetting. It's the second half of Saudi Arabia-Uruguay. Look, I won't give full match reports because you can listen to the episode of the Guardian Football Weekly Daily that we recorded last night, which will have all the reports of these games.
34:19 - 34:24
Or you could cross live to David O'Doherty from Uruguayan State Television.
34:24 - 34:33
At some point, this is going to get culturally inappropriate, isn't it? It's full-time in this game. I haven't been outside all day,
34:33 - 34:43
so I go for a walk up the hill. So opposite us, you can go into the Hollywood Hills. I'm just trying to find Rob Lowe's house. You know, something like that. Anyway, there's some big old houses in there,
34:43 - 34:49
so I'm peering in for famous people, but I don't see any. I've got my headphones in and I'm listening to 90s classics, obviously.
34:49 - 35:08
Max, I've just worked something out. If you keep walking in them there Hollywood Hills with Barry or someone else, you could take photo of yourself. If you find the Hollywood sign at the W, the D,
35:08 - 35:13
the Y, and then the D and the Y, what did you do yesterday? Sign that overlooks the city.
35:13 - 35:21
If you're really close to them, it just looks like you're next to a big white block, because it's quite hard to frame. They're really big.
35:21 - 35:36
It's a good idea. I'll see if we can make it happen. There's some very loud music, so I turn my headphones off and someone is, their garage door is open and they're listening to thrash metal, topless in cycling shorts, playing sort of on a watt bike, exercising furiously. Feels quite LA to me.
35:36 - 35:38
Yeah, slash from Guns N' Roses.
35:38 - 35:52
Slash from Guns N' Roses, big hair, top hat. Jamie calls, which is bad because I'm outside in the sun, so she can see it's sunny. It's four degrees in Melbourne. Oh, fuck. She needs to do her World Cup predictions, because these are very popular during tournaments.
35:52 - 35:55
We predict the World Cup, and she is so much better than me at it. It's just ridiculous.
35:55 - 36:08
To the listeners, you've got to check this out. It's on Max's Instagram, and the wonderful Jamie, who is holding his life together, somehow finds time in her sketch.
36:08 - 36:23
So Max just reads out the names. She's not based on anything else, apart from just the words that you say, who are the two teams who are playing, and she comes up with a really accurate, instantaneous guess as to what the score would be, and
36:23 - 36:25
she gets quite a lot of them right.
36:25 - 36:35
She does, although for Australia-Turkey, she said it would be a low-scoring game, three all, and Australia would win on penalties. Anyway, she's put some shaving foam in a bucket to distract the kids, so she's like, I've got one
36:35 - 36:47
minute to do this, and she keeps leaning out of shock, going, stop it! Anyway, so she does that. Producer Matt has made a great chicken curry. Really, really good, to the point where Barry is slightly nervous about his chilli for today, which
36:47 - 36:55
he does not think is at the same level. And between you and me, I've looked at it, and it does look a bit school dinner-y, but like, I can't give him advice.
36:55 - 36:57
Chicken curry. So it's Korean?
36:57 - 37:09
It's a curry. It's a tomato-based curry, but it's absolutely delicious. And it's got, like, fresh strips of ginger and fresh coriander on the top of it. Jamie's eating bread for dinner because he's got no time. I'm sorry. Again, I'm sorry.
37:09 - 37:23
What's this? It's Iran versus New Zealand. Obviously, watching football matches is not hard, but, like, four in a day is just, like, your sort of brain has melted, so you just can't remember who did what. I've got a script in front of me, but I still can't
37:23 - 37:37
remember who they are, what they are. Anyway, it's a good game. Once again, if you want to report on that, Guardian Football Weekly. It finishes at 8pm our time. So we walk up to the studio. It takes 10 minutes to get to the podcast studio. So me and Barry are in the studio. Barney Ronay's in Dallas.
37:37 - 37:49
Dan Bardell's in Birmingham, so he's been up all night watching these. But we want to get a vibe of what it's like watching from the UK. In the intro, the guy from New Zealand who scores two goals is called Elijah Just, but he plays alongside Chris Wood.
37:49 - 38:03
So for a long time in the chat, we're saying it's interesting that Elijah Wood is playing up front for New Zealand. But that then ends up in my intro for the podcast saying, two goals for Elijah Wood. And then later in the episode, somebody goes, did you say Elijah Wood? And then we all laugh about it.
38:03 - 38:15
And then I can't go back and re-record it because I believe in honesty. So currently, the top football podcast at the World Cup anywhere, I am announcing that Elijah Wood has scored two goals for New Zealand at the start of the game.
38:15 - 38:22
And then someone says, was that the Hobbit? And we all agree. And now we've got lots of comments saying, it's not the Hobbit, it's Frodo. You fucking idiot.
38:22 - 38:32
Yeah, this would never happen on the rest of politics. This would be like if Rory Stewart kept calling him Tony Blair Witch, and they just left it in for the whole thing. That guy's an idiot.
38:32 - 38:45
Yeah, exactly. Anyway, so we do the pod. Me and the producers have to pick up all the stuff because they kind of dress the set, and they have to come back and edit the thing. Poor guys, so they're up till like half one or something.
38:45 - 38:53
And they're doing an amazing job because they, you know, Mars Bar turns this around in two weeks. They turn it around in like an hour. We walk home. Barry goes to the pub. I go home.
38:53 - 38:55
Question there now.
38:55 - 38:57
I wouldn't associate LA with pubs.
38:57 - 39:00
Okay, bar. He goes to a bar. It's a bar.
39:00 - 39:08
Sort of boulevard of broken dreams type ones. Do you think where he's like bartender throw another scotch on the rocks?
39:08 - 39:17
Yeah, yeah, yeah. The two nearest ones to us are quite sports bar each. They're quite loud and they're quite like nice, happy person at the door saying, how can I help you?
39:17 - 39:29
But Barry does like sitting at the bar. But anyway, he goes off for a pint. I go home. I'm not that tired. So then I clean the kitchen. We didn't know there was a dustpan and brush under the sink. So I get that out and I clean the floor. I sweep the floor then clean the floor. I clean the hob.
39:29 - 39:36
I put the bins down the trash, which is really fun. There's a trash chute. So like, I like putting the bins down the trash chute.
39:36 - 39:43
Do you think if there is a drug bust on the flat, do you think you would be able to exit through that?
39:43 - 39:55
It would be a risk to get down there. I think my shoulders might be too wide. I think I might get stuck in the chute. Then you've got a dilemma, right? Because the recycling is clearly not as grim.
39:56 - 40:09
But there is a danger of like glass bottles hitting you on the head when you're stuck in the chute. Whereas if you go down the rubbish chute, you're only going to get pelted with like soft waste, you know, but it's going to be a lot of bin juice. I don't know what's worse place to be stuck.
40:09 - 40:13
When I'm in LA, I have my convertible parked directly under it.
40:13 - 40:16
I see like Penfold and Danger Mouse.
40:16 - 40:27
No, more like just cool LA, David. And so Huey Lewis or someone phones me up and says, there's good surf in Santa Monica today. Oh, yeah. I just say I'm on my way.
40:28 - 40:43
And then I've also got board shorts in the chute too so I Wallace and Gromit them on as I slide down into the convertible and head out on the freeway. That's just, I mean, we're different guys. I suppose I am living in LA life.
40:43 - 40:49
I'm in LA, but mainly I'm just going, oh, it's Suriname versus Badawayo.
40:49 - 41:01
Watch this one. I have a football question for you. So Iran, Trump has sort of belatedly and only really half let Iran be in the thing, in the World Cup.
41:01 - 41:15
In that they have to be based in Mexico and they have to fly in and out for the matches. But it did seem like among the people, when the Iranian flag was unveiled, everyone was like, yeah, Iran, cool.
41:15 - 41:17
Thanks for coming. Is that the vibe?
41:17 - 41:29
This is complex. So in Mexico, like the Tijuana's have like adopted Iran. The Iranian diaspora in LA is the biggest population of Iranians outside of Iran is LA.
41:29 - 41:37
Booed the national anthem because they don't like the Iranian state. But in like 79, I think they all left after the revolution and they all came here.
41:37 - 41:51
But they cheered on the players and there is certainly one Iranian player who's not been picked because he's criticized the regime. So there is some Iranians who do not support the team because they see them as a representation of the Iranian state.
41:51 - 41:59
And at the same time, you have the, you know, if you're hosting a World Cup, you shouldn't go to war with one of the opposition countries.
41:59 - 42:06
Famously, it's a FIFA directive, and also, you know, like there's been lots of problems with their visas and other people's visas as well.
42:06 - 42:21
No one is a monolith, and so some Iranian fans here are supporting all of it and some hate the regime, and most hate the regime, I'd say, but like the team, and some hate both of them, and some like some of the players, not some of the players. So it's slightly complex, but they were very much cheering the team when they were playing.
42:21 - 42:27
But they couldn't stop Elijah Wood popping in, despite his diminutive frame, popping in and scoring. He's got low central gravity.
42:27 - 42:29
One ring to find him.
42:29 - 42:31
He's just there going, my precious.
42:31 - 42:49
It's good that this podcast's favourite Iranian, Omid Djalili, didn't get the coaching gig and then advised them all to drink that tea on the morning of the match, such that at any given time, there's only three players on the pitch, because everyone
42:49 - 42:51
else is shitting their pants.
42:51 - 42:58
It's ten o'clock, I get into bed, I do the Squardle, and I go to sleep. David, what did you do yesterday?
42:58 - 43:16
I love this. This is it. This is the new ending to the regular episodes. Well, Max, I'm going to tell you what I did yesterday on the new In It For Life feed that you can sign up for.
43:16 - 43:23
Where do we sign up for it again? Damn it. I really, I thought it was going so slick.
43:23 - 43:25
Yesterdaypod.supportingcast.fm
43:25 - 43:36
Maybe we'll see you over there. If not, or even if you do, everyone will be hearing our normal guest episode on Sunday and this episode on a Wednesday.
43:36 - 43:41
And for freeloaders, that's all they get. But for lifers, ho, ho, ho, ho.
43:41 - 43:46
Oh, and if you'd like to get in touch with the podcast, here is how.
43:46 - 44:01
To get in touch with the show, you can email us at whatdidyoudoyesterdaypod at gmail.com Follow us on Instagram at yesterdaypod. And please subscribe and leave a review if you liked it on your preferred podcast platform.
44:01 - 44:09
And if you didn't, please don't. So thank you, David, but what time did you wake up yesterday morning?
44:09 - 44:14
Yesterday, I woke up at... I'll just do a wee.