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Podcasts, there are millions of them. Some might say too many. I have one already.
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I don't have any because there are enough. Politics, business, sport, you name it. There's a podcast about it and they all ask the big questions and cover the hot topics of the day.
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But nobody is covering the most important topic of all. Why is that? Are they scared?
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Too afraid of being censored by the man? Possibly, but not us. We're here to ask the only question that matters.
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We try and say it at the same time, Max. What did you do yesterday?
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What did you do yesterday? What did you do yesterday? That's it. All we're interested in is what the guest got up to yesterday.
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Nothing more. Day before yesterday, Max. Nope. The greatest and most interesting day of your life.
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Unless it was yesterday, we don't want to know about it. I'm Max Rushden. And I'm David O'Doherty.
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Welcome to What Did You Do Yesterday? Hello and welcome to today's episode of What Did You Do Yesterday?
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My name's Max Rushden. I'm alongside me, David O'Doherty. And on today's episode, David, we speak to one of my...
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I can't do it. Rosie Jones! Yeah, Rosie Jones. Rosie's one of the great comedians working today.
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She just comes at it from a slightly different angle to any other comedian that I know.
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It is always a joy to hang out with her. And this is a day unlike any others.
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I mean, I don't want to trail it by saying there's a lot of motorway services because I don't think that necessarily will make people want to listen.
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No, but if you really have a thing for Reading Services Eastbound, this is the episode for you.
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She co-wrote and stars in Pushers, which is all on the Channel 4 app thing. All right, Grandad.
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And her tour. What's her tour called, David? Her tour is called I Can't Tell What She's Saying.
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Just bloody go and see. She gives her Ocho a harsh review here. But everything she does is wonderful.
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Sorry for the tape. As will become apparent, she's in a cantina, a premier inn.
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Oh, yeah. And for the first 10 to 50 minutes, it's quite noisy around her. But I think everybody eventually gets so annoyed with her banging on about what she did yesterday that it does go silent.
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So if you're finding the ambient noise of phones ringing and people sort of banging pots for a little bit, that does subside.
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We deal with it pretty well. Yeah, I think so. I think so. But it's always good to take the listeners with you.
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That's my experience. Oh, I see. Yes. Yeah. Okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's a bit of radio expertise there.
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Just thrown in there. Signpost everything. Rosie Jones did yesterday. Rosie Jones, welcome to What Did You Do Yesterday?
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Hello. Okay. Let me have it straight. I know D.O.D. I love David.
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Too much. It's my boss. Why is that too much? Because I know there's a book coming here.
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Yeah, but it's not your book to deal with. It's Max's book. Oh, right. Okay.
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Max, I don't know you. No. The love that I have for D.O.D.
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Is missing for you. I understand. I understand. But by the end of this podcast, I reckon you might love me more than you love David.
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Oh, God. Okay. We have an hour to distribute all the love I have. And you know what?
4:19 - 4:36
You are two white, straight, non-disabled men. So you are at a base level. Very hard to look.
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Question one. You sound like you're in a school canteen, Jonesy. We obviously, we don't care about today, only yesterday.
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But just where do we find you today? Well, it is because I am currently on tour.
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So I am not in a school canteen. Okay. I am in a premier inn because I am living the high life.
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I am in a maidstone. Wow. But the Wi-Fi, of course, it didn't get to my hotel room.
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Why would it get to my hotel room? Because I am ten doors away from the Wi-Fi router.
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So I am now here in the canteen where I get Wi-Fi good. But I also get a lot of lovely, lovely ladies washing up breakfast.
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They are going to get one half of this. And they possibly won't even know it's a podcast recording.
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They'll just think you, for some reason, are talking to your mother and telling her every single thing that you did yesterday.
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And that intrigues me as to what they think. To be fair, that is not unusual.
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Andrea Jones is a lovely, lovely lady. But she is an incredibly nosy bitch. So it wouldn't be surprising.
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We have had guests on before who've said that Rosie's mum is a nosy bitch.
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And I wasn't sure if we should bring it up this soon into the podcast.
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But it's good that it's out there. Oh, yeah. She'll be listening right now. That's how nosy she is.
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Give us some space, Andrea. Fuck's sake. Come on, Andrea. I'm 35. Let me live my fucking life.
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Also, Andrea, just be aware that you've been infringing the copyright of this podcast by making Rosie go through what she did yesterday in the past.
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So we will be serving legal letters to Andrea Jones straight after we finish talking to you.
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Is it okay if when she does it, she wears a hat and she puts on a silly Irish accent?
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She's looked into parody law and nothing will okay. Okay. Jones, Andrea, stop impersonating me.
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This is getting too much. Okay, come on. Let's cut to the chase here. Come on, David.
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Come on. Let's get down to serious business before Andrea rings on that landline again.
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Rosie, what time did you wake up yesterday? Oh, I had a line because I had a busy day the day before.
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So I did not wake up until 11 a.m. No. Oh, my God. Wow. That is low performance waking up time.
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Oh, my God. Tom Rosenthal got up at midnight the previous day. No. Oh, my God.
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That boy needs a talking to. I strongly agree with that. You're on tour. Do you wake up in a hotel at 11?
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See, 11 is late to wake up at a hotel. Are you getting knocked out on the door?
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No. So I always go for midday checkouts. It is a game changer. And I really feel like I started my day on a high.
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11 a.m. I'm rested. I'm relaxed. I've had my first lying in about a month.
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I'm feeling good until I remember where I am. Where are you? I am in a travel lodge.
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Shit. At Reading Services. Wow. After no mentions of Reading for a year and a half, we've now had Reading Services mentioned twice in quick succession.
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Alison Spittle was on the air bridge at Reading Services, marvelling at the skyline of Reading.
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Can you confirm? Like she had an emotional moment. Yeah. Did you see her? Had she gone back?
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When you opened your curtains, was the first thing you saw? Alison Spittle just crying as she looked at some chimneys.
10:51 - 11:22
Now, I unfortunately did not see Alison Spittle, mainly because I was too busy questioning all my life choices that had led me to waking up in a travel lodge in Reading Services.
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And this might be our most boring episode yet, and this is a spoiler alert, but I think 80% of my entire day happened at Reading Services.
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Hang on. People have been waiting for the Reading Services transit to Maidstone. This is the episode that people have been waiting for.
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This is why this podcast was designed in the first place. I'm excited. It's like a really shit version of the Terminal.
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You know, the Tom Hanks film, isn't it? Yeah. Your whole life is at Reading Services.
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Wow. Yeah. I'm excited. I'm excited. So, it's 11am. Do I get out of bed immediately?
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Mm-hmm. No. No, no, no. I am currently playing a game called Tasty Travels. Tasty Travels, right.
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So, it's an iPhone game. What the hell happens in Tasty Travels? It's my entire life, right?
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All I got to do is to link two of the same kind. So, for example, if I link two prawns, I will make a bigger prawn.
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Where's the travel aspect to this? I thought you'd be like, you travel to Portugal where you link a prawn with an Australian shrimp.
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You know what I mean? Something like that. Oh, no. That is very deceptive because there's absolutely no travelling at all.
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It's all about linking up. You can link up a football with another football. And of course, that will make a football group.
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Of course. Right. It says here, open your phone and join us on a journey around the culinary world.
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Tasty Travels. Is that what we're on? In Tasty Travels, you get to travel the world while experiencing local cuisines, learning to make various speciality dishes, and sharing with friends from all corners of the globe, including Reading Services.
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The most exciting part, you can combine two identical ingredients to create new exquisite dishes, reveling in the joy of cooking, it says.
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So, for example, if it was like Ready, Steady Cook, and all I had was two footballs to feed someone.
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Yeah. I could combine them and make a glove out of them. Yeah. So, you're telling me.
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Yeah. Perfect. Mmm. So, I think that synopsis is interesting because it did start very food-based, but now I'm on level 100.
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We're going into the football world. We're going into the bottle world. So, it's all about choosing what you are making.
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And I am so sorry to say that I played Tasty Travels for about 45 minutes.
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Okay. I have a question. If you combine two prawns, you get a giant prawn.
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If you combine the giant prawn with another prawn, do you get an even bigger prawn?
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You see, he writes for The Guardian. Yeah. Yeah. Thank you, Max, for asking the questions everyone wants to hear.
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It really depends. So, if I remember correctly, you go little prawn, medium prawn, bigger prawn.
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Chicken. That feels like it's not a sequence. I'll only connect. They're never getting that, are they?
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I thought it was going to go like scorpion. No, maybe prawn, then scorpion, then like lobster in terms of like shelled, earwiggy, clawed animals, something like that.
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No, there's a lot of... Oh, they know they're recovered their prawns. Someone's been sweating, and there's a leak in the room where they've gone cheeky and they've gone
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Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Big round of applause. That person gets a raise.
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They're the CEO. Yeah. Prawn, prawn, prawn. Ring the bell. Ring the bell. Ding, ding, ding.
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So, Jonesy, you do this for 45 minutes, lying in the Reading Services Travel Lodge bed.
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I do. And I'm also listening to Katherine Ryan's podcast. Yeah. As I do this.
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And she's a very clever lady. She's talking about putting her flat on sale. Did I temporarily think shall I buy Katherine Ryan's flat?
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And then I thought, I can't buy Katherine Ryan's flat. I'm in a travel lodge at Reading Services.
18:24 - 18:35
Yeah, but what if you're such an eccentric billionaire, you have bought the entire travel lodge at Reading Services, and you sleep in a different room every night.
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You just love travel. You love the frisson, the excitement of people going to other parts of the country.
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How do you think it'll cost? I think I could pick it up for a million pounds.
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It would be intriguing when you go to settle your bill when you're checking out of the travel lodge, and you just have like a black sack with money on it,
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and you dump it on the counter. Do you have any extras, Rosie? Yes. One extra.
19:08 - 19:14
I'm buying the whole place and all of you. It's just not when you're scrolling through Right Move.
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You just go house, house, house, travel lodge at Reading Services, and you show it to your wife, and you go, Jamie, I didn't ask you because I knew you'd want it,
19:23 - 19:45
but this is what we've got. But I don't see a downside to buying the travel lodge at Reading Services, because first of all, 24-7 parties.
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Yeah, well, yeah. Of sorts. Of sorts. Secondly, as a comedian, you always have comedy friends who want places to stay, ideally at Reading Services.
20:10 - 20:14
It's true. I mean, it does have good links to the rest of the country, doesn't it?
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Probably got a Wild Bean Cafe as well, nearby. Oh, well, we'll get into that.
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I know exactly what they have in Reading Services. OK, Rosie, it's 11.45. You've done your tasty travels.
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If you haven't already, it's time to seize the day. Yeah. I'm not really seizing anything yet, apart from the soap slash shampoo slash conditioner box in the shower.
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Are you stealing it? I am eating. Famously, there's enough nutrition in it. If you don't get the breakfast, you drink from the general purpose cleaning detergent product.
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No, I'm getting the quickest shower over and putting the soap slash shampoo slash conditioner everywhere.
21:35 - 22:04
I'm using the suds made from hair to wash my armpits. It's a very bubbly situation, but I feel a lot cleaner than I did in my tasty travels era.
22:04 - 22:23
So when I use that multi-product, when my hair is longer, it boofs out. And I look like Wendeline, who Wallace from Wallace and Gromit, his love interest, whereby it just boofs everything to this enormous.
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So then I basically have to wear a woolly hat for the day to bring it back down again.
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Does this have the same effect on your beautiful flex and locks, Rosie? Probably, because I then let it dry in the air.
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And as you can see, it's looking okay. Yes. So much so that it seems like it's, what's the slogan?
22:56 - 23:07
I'm worth it. Maybe I'm worth it. Yeah. Except the product in question is the multi-purpose bathroom slash body slash hair cleaner available in travel lodges.
23:07 - 23:14
We haven't really had as detailed the process of showering since Adam Buxton. And he did it cold.
23:15 - 23:20
And I'm wondering, I'm interested in the temperature you're going for here, Rose. I'm a hot shower guy.
23:20 - 23:26
It's nicer. But Adam Buxton's more successful. I am hot. You're hot, of course. Yeah.
23:27 - 23:41
Sometimes, about once a year, I try a cold one. And then I go, this is amazing.
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I should do this every single day. And then I do remember that I like myself.
23:56 - 24:13
So, yeah, hot, hot, hot all the way. The hotter, the better. Okay, good. This isn't me, but it will sound like me.
24:13 - 24:58
But I have a friend who gets sexually aroused by hot things. What? And then, especially in the shower, he will challenge himself to put it on as hot as possible to the point that it will scald his skin because it finds the feeling of burning himself.
24:59 - 25:07
What? Very sexy. Wow. I mean, it's possible my co-presenter here met his wife on a volcano in South America.
25:07 - 25:14
So it's possible you now associate great heat with a sort of sexy horniness then too.
25:14 - 25:29
We won't participate in anything carnal unless we're on a lava flow. When you met your wife on the volcano, were you sexually aroused?
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I mean, I was more than she was. I think it's fair to say. I wouldn't say aroused.
25:34 - 25:40
Like, I wasn't like... We don't have time to go into it, Rosie, but he spent several years just coincidentally turning up and where she was.
25:40 - 25:46
You know, she would be in Aspen, Colorado, and he would just be like sipping a latte in a local cafe.
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Fancy meeting you here, you know? That kind of a thing. So it took a while.
25:52 - 26:07
That is exactly what I thought when I met you. Herbert of the highest order.
26:08 - 26:19
Absolutely, yeah. That's how I'm known. Yeah. Yeah. Question, it's midday, you've got checkout, you're washed, you're dressed, it's time to hit the services, I presume.
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Starving, you're starving. Yeah, I'm checking out. Can I call the front bit of a travel lodge a foyer?
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Barely. It doesn't feel very foyer-y, does it? So I meet my tour manager Ash at the foyer of the grand travel lodge and we look at each other and we go,
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we need to work and we need coffee pumped into our phones immediately. So we walk about ten steps into riding services.
27:25 - 27:32
Here we go. Highway to the danger zone. Here we go. And you know what?
27:32 - 27:46
It says small services, but it's got all the things I need. It's got a Pret,
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M&S, it's got a Costa, a W. H. Smith, and a McDonald's. So you're laughing?
28:04 - 28:16
Yeah, it'd be good if it had one real curveball shop. You know, for no reason it has like a Timpson's or something like that that no one has been to for the last five years, just sitting there.
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Where do you go of this list? I'm going to predict. Where's Rosie going? Costa.
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Straight to Costa. She's more Pret than Costa. Well, I'll give you a clue. I get my food from one place, and I get my coffee from another.
28:41 - 28:53
No one is going food from Costa. Unless it was the only thing. So it's got to be coffee from Costa, food from Pret, unless I've missed some of the other ones.
28:53 - 29:06
No, it's food from M&S. You're getting food from M&S. But what I need to know is, do you then get in trouble when, because it's a fair judgment on Pret when you sit down and
29:06 - 29:17
start eating the salmon and cream cheese sandwich from Marks and Spencer's. So, D-O-D, you are right.
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I will food from M&S, coffee from Pret, because coffee from Costa is absolutely fucking dog shit.
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This podcast is brought to you by Costa. get the new Armoured Latte, just £3.99 from Reading Westbound.
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There's a rumour it tastes like dog shit, but we don't know where that rumour started.
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And this comes from a woman who had just washed her entire hair and body with warm product.
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Do you think that they say to themselves in Pret, it's the iconic Rosie Jones, we will not come down on her like a ton of bricks for violating the main rule of Pret.
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Do you think you're leveraging your celebrity status in Reading Services here? So this is why Reading Services is great, because they don't really have tables for the restaurants.
30:46 - 30:59
It's open plan. It's just an open plan communal area. Got it. They don't give a shit what you're eating.
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This is interesting. From 2017, so obviously it's a little while ago, the BBC no less, England's best and worst motorway service stations named.
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The M4's Reading Services Westbound takes the crown for the country's best stop off with a customer satisfaction score of 100%.
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100? We are the Westbound or the Eastbound Rosie? You are the best one there is.
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So we were going from Bristol to Maidstone. Oh no, that's Eastbound, isn't it?
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South. Oh, fuck. Yeah, you blew it. You had such a chance. Imagine 100%. That means no one has ever had any problem.
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No one's ever had a bad day. No one has ever taken like a leaky poo there.
31:48 - 31:55
Nothing bad has ever happened in the Westbound. You are in the Eastbound. Oh, damn it.
31:56 - 32:07
That's why I was so sad. Okay, so we open our laptop. We presumably have free Wi-Fi there.
32:07 - 32:27
Wait a minute, because there's a table situation. So the exact services we're talking about is a moto, M-O-T-O.
32:28 - 32:48
Yeah. I love a moto for their work booths. Oh, wow. Their kind of spaces covered with plugs and it feels quite private.
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We get there and we go hopefully we can get a booth. Now, all five are taken by what can only be described as the same woman thrown five times.
33:20 - 33:29
Okay, I'm going to predict. So it's a lady with a blonde bob in a Karen type unit low coloured puffer jacket.
33:29 - 33:35
Is that a pencil skirt? what do think? Yeah, and they've all got a newspaper.
33:36 - 33:48
They've all got their daily mails. Yes, good. And they're all absolutely seething at their husbands.
33:53 - 33:58
you'd think one of them would be like, Rosie, you need to keep writing your iconic comedy.
33:59 - 34:06
Please have my little space. I'm just getting outraged by whatever the Daily Mail is outraged by at the moment.
34:06 - 34:22
It's the mail on the small boats. I'm going to blow your mind and break your heart in one small sentence.
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Ready? Some people in the world don't give a shit about me. I have never met any of these people.
34:40 - 34:47
There are five people that don't give a shit. They're lined up in booths at the Moto Eastbound.
34:48 - 35:09
So we sit down at a much inferior table and Ash is talking to me but all I am thinking is eyes on the booth.
35:09 - 35:43
Eyes on the booth and as soon as one of the clones gets up the cerebral palsy in my body goes away and you have not seen a person sprinting into a booth quick and
35:43 - 36:23
we're there we're in the booth I'm using all the plug sockets I'm charging my laptop I'm charging my phone I'm charging my headphones ready for you boys thank you beautiful sound I'm eating my Wednesday day old sandwich I'm eating my olives I'm drinking my coffee I'm a happy
36:23 - 36:55
lady. It's almost a perfect daily mail story, would be so-called woke comedian Rosie Jones, I saw her sprinting across Reading services to steal a table from someone else. Hmmmmm? Able bodied? And if I heard that I would say come get me, come get me, okay.
36:55 - 37:08
so we've had a coffee we've had a sandwich we've chatted to Ash where are we going now I would imagine you'd be on the way to Maidstone but you want to stay in the services a little longer this is such rookie behaviour by Max Rosie you don't want
37:08 - 37:47
to get to Maidstone pre 5pm like is that a rule DOD you are so right we lock in we get more coffees I'm gonna rush through this bit because would you believe it's even more boring than my tasty travels 45 minutes but
37:47 - 38:36
I do emails I do my receipts I edit a video that I'm doing advertising the national lottery wow yeah I do a Instagram post post of photos taken on me where I look very beautiful great surprise surprise actually also the director of my foundation oh Rosie Jones foundation
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I'm a good lady and don't you ever forget it so we had a big talk about our next steps and what we're doing yeah I feel like we were there for about three hours I guess once you've got a booth you've got a booth right
39:08 - 39:46
Max we had a booth if you could have said to me with the utmost confidence in Maidstone you will get a booth we would have gone to Maidstone I get that I can't take that I'm not sure if there was firstly congratulations you are the first person
39:46 - 40:07
with a foundation that we have spoken to Nish Kumar does not to the best of my knowledge have one Sara Pascoe absolutely not the David had already foundation if I did have one like what would it be like tiny keyboard it be for bicycle repair yeah but
40:07 - 40:43
that's a bike shop that's not really a foundation you'd call it food and then I just hand out tiny keyboards and they're like go fuck yourself yeah all of sub-saharan Africa pressing demo all pressing demo maybe you could make tiny edible keyboards oh yeah oh god what's the
40:43 - 41:13
foundation do so it helps people with cerebral palsy with a focus on mental health so if you got a physical disability you're much more likely to suffer with your mental health so
41:13 - 41:56
for example we just donated a large chunk of money to a company that pairs disabled people with therapists who have the same disability as them which is a huge game changer because I've had a lot of non disabled therapists and
41:56 - 42:28
without that common ground it's so hard to talk about what you need to talk about and this company works a lot with the NHS but naturally the waiting lists at the NHS are so
42:28 - 43:00
long that with our help they've been able to clear the waiting list and it means all the people with CP who needed immediate help are getting it fucking hell jeez what am I I'm just playing a little key it's okay
43:00 - 43:15
David the thing is David I used to do a lot of charity work and then I had children and I am too tired to help anyone even myself so when they're 25 years old I'll go back to doing something good the Max Rushden foundation just tries to pair Max
43:15 - 45:12
Rushden with baristas that know how to make his really annoying three quarter double flat white yeah yeah, it's an important calling. That's brilliant Rosie. Yeah, well done Rosie, So what time are we moving out of Reading services? So me and Ash are very neuro spacey - when we get locked into work, nothing happens around us. So I think we initially said we'll get on the road at half two, ok, and we got on the road at four o'clock. Woah! Yes. So then we had missed the time for food at Maidstone. Oh shit. So then we are on the motorway and we stop off at another service station. yes. A two station day, this is good. And em, but I cannot remember which one it was. Oh come on. Shit. Could you tell me about how far into the journey it was, cos I'm on google maps here, so you're going to be going A329 past Slough, and then you're going to take the m25, and you're probably going to go through redhill, seven oaks, on your way to maidstone. So I'm just trying to wonder about where.. So we were about 15 minutes away from Maidstone, oh ok, I can really now, this is like hunted.
45:15 - 45:25
15 minutes from Maidstone right now I'm just going to have to go services what did the services have in it Jonesy was it a similar setup with all these great options and
45:25 - 46:00
shared tables so this is why we stopped there because it had a Leon I love a Leon okay so to our international listeners how do we describe a Leon it's like a Michelin starred takeaway where even the boxes are fancy yeah like if McDonald's sold real food yes
46:00 - 46:21
if McDonald's had a string quartet in the corner yeah and a server came over and said I trust everything is delicious for me that's Leon pure class okay I think I have it guys I think you were at Clacket Lane eastbound there is a Leon it only
46:21 - 46:45
gets a 3.2 I was at Clacket Lane yes and soon then she said it I was like off course we were at Clacket Lane that's the closest I've ever felt to being in the FBI I think you know what it felt good it felt really good do you
46:45 - 47:11
get the meatballs do you get meatballs in a box no I get the chicken nuggets oh they're good nuggets they are very good also sorry can I say a side note please that you probably noticed that it's very quiet now
47:11 - 47:56
and that is because every single member of their premiering kitchen team have gone home and for the last hour they've been cleaning around me giving me such dirty love when everyone mentioned the travel love I was trying to think what they would think you were doing and I've
47:56 - 48:08
decided we're police investigators you know what I mean we're trying to figure out how watertight your alibi is for some murder you definitely committed yesterday but because of the cuts we do everything remotely now
48:08 - 48:16
it's a bit of a problem then we say if we think you're guilty we say now could you just come in because we need to imprison you for 25 years okay now
48:16 - 48:51
so are we straight to the theatre in Maidstone yes because we eat now I am eating the nuggets on the go and then we get there to the Hazel Theatre theatre it's a beautiful venue we go straight onto stage cool I saw our sound I saw our lighting
48:51 - 49:08
and it is all looking good I thought for a second you were just this was so exciting you were just running on stage with half a Leon chicken nugget and then just going good evening Maidstone and just toss the rest into the crowd and go here we are
49:09 - 49:22
I mean have a nugget you fuckers what a tagline that would be it's the title of the show why is the show called have a nugget you fuckers and then
49:22 - 49:40
jonesy walks out and like confetti they start to drop from the ceiling that people have made stood all on the floor just gobbling up Leon nuggets yeah no so we're talking about half six right
49:40 - 49:58
now yeah and the show starts at seven oh shit you've got a seven o'clock show no sorry doors half seven okay half seven okay right how do we fill that last hour then
49:58 - 50:38
between soundcheck and ladies and gentlemen rosie jones naturally it's about trash talking fellow comedian daniel kitchen so you're engaging with is it via voice message or is it via text via text because the night before i was in britch stole old vick and i get a text at
50:38 - 51:21
half six from mr kitchen saying i am where you were last night yeah and i said i am not fucking telling you where i was last night where do you think i was last night it was a very aggressive yes hello yeah but i'm just annoyed that i
51:21 - 51:47
didn't know that he would be there because i would have left a present for him what do you mean are we talking about a poo in a bag jonesy surely not oh not in a bag yeah in a ziplock no i didn't want a blue plastic bag
51:47 - 51:55
oh that's sweet that is sweet yeah you get good money for them on ebay there's a lot of them knocking around but yeah yeah
51:59 - 52:12
so we trash talk kitson do you have a tour support or are you doing the whole show yourself no i'm out there raw dogging raw dogging madison why not
52:14 - 52:33
it's true because i mean if you have a support they effectively take care of the raw vibes and you just come on like ed gamble in the second half to the great cheers and roars but the real ones go out off the top jonesy yeah they're your protection
52:34 - 52:56
they're your barrier without that me and just road dogging all over the place em how is it are they excited to see you how are the people i've never been to maidstone i would imagine they're hardy coastal folk probably the waft of herring smokers in the room
52:56 - 53:32
you know i would say sorry maidstone but they have a pure six out of ten they are smiling they are laughing are are they laughing a bit delayed sure have i got to tell them to pick up their act and
53:32 - 53:56
to be better yes great do i say i know i'm amazing so do a fucking better job yeah they love that audiences famously love that when you're again part motivator that's what you are as well
53:56 - 54:11
do they improve will daniel kitson because he's obviously just following you around the country now they'll be ready for him yeah daniel kitson will have a lovely night tonight and
54:11 - 54:39
after i did a lovely meet and greet apart from the last lady so i do a meet and greet every night and people are so lovely so polite and then
54:39 - 55:14
you always get one who always means well oh no but they hang back because they go i think i am funny and i think me and rosie will be friends oh no the problem with that is they are not funny and
55:14 - 55:41
we will not be friends come on what did she say so this lady i would hazard a guess was in her mid to late 50s and in the show i eat half a banana okay
55:41 - 56:08
of course i do absolutely so this lady had gone on the stage and stolen my banana oh no and told me that she was taking it home to freeze it oh gosh this is getting sinister now
56:08 - 56:48
because my lips have all been over the banana wow oh god and when i asked her that she wanted a photo with me she said no because having a photo with you when i don't even know you is weird oh god to which i said but
56:48 - 57:13
stealing a banana and freezing it because my mouth had touched it that is not weird and she said exactly it reminds me a bit of a friend of mine is comedian and
57:13 - 57:23
once i was in a pub someone asked him for a photo and then four people wanted to be in a and i don't
57:26 - 57:43
have a fucking clue who you are and just went back which is like as if my friend had been like all right line up everyone i'll do some photos you know there's a desire to put people in their places i think less do you think you're getting
57:43 - 57:55
a bit above yourself do do do you think when you next play maidstone she'll be back and she'll have a frozen banana do you wonder about the banana oh so
57:55 - 58:35
on the 10 minute drive to the premier where you see me now beautiful place me and ash started talking about what's in store for that banana but as well as that she did tell me that she would like to kiss me with tools and
58:35 - 59:08
she asked me if I wanted to feel her brats to which I politely declined but I think that will give you a little insight what will happen to that banana because you know you sometimes think about like a cat and
59:08 - 59:24
the luck of where they're born and who their owners are or whatever and maybe most bananas probably live a good life up until being consumed there are better places to be a banana some bananas get open too early they're a bit hard some are perfectly some go moldy
59:24 - 59:54
but this banana is like, this banana has been captured, I almost feel we need to rescue the banana. Yeah, pray for the banana yeah yeah maybe we could get a SWAT team to try I feel like that banana needs a lot of if it ever makes it out. It'll be like that room with Barack Obama and Madeline Albright when they're getting Bin Laden. We've got the banana.
59:54 - 1:00:06
they're rescuing the banana it's like the analogy doesn't quite work you take my point so you're telling us they shoot the banana and throw it in the sea it was better that we shot the banana that it went through what we know it was going to go through
1:00:07 - 1:00:30
so we return or we don't return we embark on a new journey to this fresh premiere inn which is in terms of room cost about 15 quid more than a travel lodge do you immediately feel that extra 15 pounds of luxury I do I do but
1:00:30 - 1:01:00
now we're tying everything into a lovely bow because I immediately realised that I cannot get wifi in my room so I go fuck how am I gonna do the podcast tomorrow so
1:01:00 - 1:01:28
I worry about that slightly but then I realised you know what I haven't played for about 10 hours oh yeah we know let's make two bananas a giant banana tasty travels tasty travels and
1:01:28 - 1:01:54
then because I wanted to go into the night thinking about you two I listened to the Helen Bower episode trapped on public transport that episode so traumatic I thought it would calm me down but
1:01:54 - 1:02:21
it reminded me how much of a fucking idiot she is do do we doze off to sleep while playing tasty travels a bit of a book anything do we have a drink before we go to bed just raw dog raw dog the night just dry raw dog tasty
1:02:21 - 1:02:53
travels you to the fucking public transport idiot and then at a point I fall asleep there's a day on the road I like it because it's not the most glamorous like you know Rob Beckett's day on the road opens with like being picked up by his this is
1:02:53 - 1:03:17
for anyone who goes oh my god Tom must be amazing no it is six hours in reading services and just leaving a banana to get sexually assaulted
1:03:20 - 1:03:35
Rosie Jones thank you very much for telling us what you did yesterday I love you boys Max yeah a little bit oh there we go I love you Rosie
1:03:45 - 1:04:04
what a great episode David the fact that you think you've had enough service station yeah and then she pulls right into another one and that is just you know also my heart melted in the league table of hotels the fact that she has to come to the canteen
1:04:04 - 1:04:11
that doesn't reflect well I wouldn't say I'm a premier in loyalist right ultra you're not an ultra no I
1:04:58 - 1:05:16
a episodes because without them it it's not a lot of content so yes here's how you get in touch to get in touch with the show you can email us at what did you do yesterday pod at gmail.com follow us on instagram at yesterday pod and please
1:05:16 - 1:05:23
subscribe and leave a review if you liked it on your preferred podcast platform and if you didn't please don't
1:05:25 - 1:05:48
hey thanks David to the ladies who blocked the posh seats in the eastbound reading services because you know we got a real window into Rosie's life from that everything is showbiz in it for life yes yes