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Podcasts, there are millions of them. Some might say too many. I have one already.
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I don't have any because there are enough. Politics, business, sport, you name it, there's a podcast about it.
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And they all ask the big questions and cover the hot topics of the day.
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But nobody is covering the most important topic of all. Why is that? Are they scared?
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Too afraid of being censored by the man? Possibly, but not us. We're here to ask the only question that matters.
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We try and say it at the same time, Max. What did you do yesterday?
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What did you do yesterday? That's it. All we're interested in is what the guests got up to yesterday.
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Nothing more. Day before yesterday, Max? Nope. The greatest and most interesting day of your life?
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Unless it was yesterday, we don't want to know about it. I'm Max Rushden. And I'm David O'Doherty.
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Welcome to What Did You Do Yesterday? Hello, welcome to episode 10. We're now basically part of the establishment, David O'Doherty, aren't we?
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We're now, we're the liberal elites now, aren't we? The rest is yesterday. That's what they call us.
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I think so. I'm amazed the rest is yesterday. They haven't come in for a massive bid for this podcast.
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I'll be honest with you. I wouldn't take six figures from the rest is crew.
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I think they would curtail our, you know, they would stifle us. Seven figures, I'd give it Lineker.
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Is he the rest is? I'd give it all Lineker. I mean, I haven't checked the emails, but I would imagine there's a lot of offers in.
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But we're not taking, we're not taking any money. No way. Because we do this for the love of it.
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And we're going to do it for the rest of our lives. Yeah, we're pure.
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Do you want some feedback? No. Oh, okay. Well. Okay, go on. Okay, good. Jonathan in Brooklyn says, hello.
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Here's what I was doing at the exact moment. David wondered what all the listeners were doing.
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Because you did ask, what are you doing? Yeah. I was. I was on a city bike, public rental bikes in New York City.
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On my way to return some clothes at J. Crew in Battery Park City, Manhattan.
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It was very meta. Since Jen Brister was telling her story about cycling to town to return shoes.
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We're all just doing the same thing, says Jonathan in Brooklyn. He's right. Very American, though.
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He was eating a hot dog as well. And holding, instead of gloves, two baseball catcher's mitts.
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I shouldn't wonder. Actually, they're not public rental bikes. They are. They are public rental rodeo bulls.
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It's really hard to get them back in the slots, isn't it? What's really annoying is if you're on your rented rodeo bull, and then you get to one that's full,
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so then you have to rodeo around Manhattan trying to find an empty slot to stick in your rodeo bull.
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It's true, with six clowns dancing around you to distract it so you could click it back in.
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Wow, Brooklyn. That's amazing. Most of my feedback is reflected directly from you, Max, as you know.
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Oh, okay, yeah. But, like, I don't respond to them, but just know that I think about them.
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Max, you're a grade one tosser. Where did this come from? This was one on Twitter, because we're both tagged in the release of the podcast.
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But, I mean, all I would say to that is, in piano, there's eight grades.
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Yeah, you're right. Grade one is actually the gentlest. Grade of tosser to be. In many ways, grade one, you're not even really able to toss, are you?
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Oh, that's very sweet, whoever said that. What's most interesting was, because I believe, and I'm not totally sure of this, but my understanding is that the Jen Brister episode was late because of the number of people.
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It's a bit like trying to buy Oasis tickets. The number of people trying to download our podcast is so extreme that the internet broke.
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Interestingly, a lot of people were like, where is it? Was it on a Sunday morning?
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People were wanting to know where it was. Yeah. Which is, I think, a good sign, isn't it?
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Yeah. It was three hours late, I think, and we had apparently derailed a lot of people's Sunday mornings, even though we've only existed now for nine weeks because this is episode 10.
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Doesn't it feel like longer? I mean, I'm enjoying it. It's like years. I've got a long message for you.
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Hi, Max. Hi, David. This is from Dave. It's a good one, I think. Firstly, thanks for introducing this podcast and meaning I have to carve even more time out of my life to listen to more stuff.
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Seriously, I'm really enjoying this. As an antidote to all the depressing news out there, it's cheering me up no end.
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The only fly in the ointment is the fact that I seem to spend every day at one point or another listening to Max Rushden, which is probably something I need to discuss with my psychologist.
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Anyway, the real reason I had to write was after the Josh Widdicombe pod and the discussion of David's experiences in France and also with, you'll have to correct me on the pronunciation,
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Brad Meldau. Oh, yeah. He's a jazz. He's the most celebrated pianist in jazz, Max.
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Yeah. Yes, of course. I'm a big Spiderbeck guy. What can I do? Class from a big Spiderbeck fan.
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I would be amazed if David remembers this, but back in 2001, my girlfriend, now wife, and I were fresh out of university and living in Nice, working for the ice cream mafia.
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It's a thing, honest, in the various shops. But they had there. At the time, we were sharing an apartment with an Irish girl called Orla.
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One evening, she introduced us to her friend who was visiting, one David O'Doherty. During an evening on the beach, he discovered that I was about to start a career as a musician, was a fan of jazz,
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and he gave me a tape of someone he knew called Brad Meldo. Apparently, Brad had spent some time in Ireland getting clean and had met David.
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That's what David runs, a sort of priory in Ireland. And that's where we get all our guests from.
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It's because when they say I've stayed in David's flat that is code for rehab.
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I'd met David, he said he'd met David and his family there. We liked hanging out with David.
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He mentioned he'd just published a kid's book. So he bought a copy to incrementally add to the royalties he hopefully received.
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Fast forward to today, and our eldest daughter is an enormous fan of Dr. Noel's own.
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Wow. And keeps hoping for a new Dangerous Everywhere book. These are children's books of mine, I should add.
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Yeah. Wow. Yeah, not mine. Yeah. So David, thanks for influencing our lives so much.
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What a delight. I mean, the first thought that comes to mind there, Max, is that, so he lived with Orla, who is a friend of mine still.
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She is a GP, and she is the unfortunate GP who I send voice messages to when I don't want to go and see my actual GP with the thing that's wrong with me.
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So I have a slightly swollen right kneecap at the moment that she diagnosed via another voice message as bursitis and how I need to ice it before I go cycling Yeah, I could have told you ice.
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You know, she's not doing much there, I would say. Anyway, thank you, Dave. Anyway, a couple more bits of feedback.
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Spot 665 says, Wife and I listen to this together every week. We listen to the third episode while driving from Turin to Genoa on our honeymoon.
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We both agreed it's the perfect driving pod. It is interesting enough to keep you intrigued, but not too much that it gets your heart racing.
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He says, we play which Taskmaster contestant will be on the pod next? She's winning 2-0.
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I sort of get what you mean. Like, I'm a big, I don't reveal too much about my innermost desires, but I love Steely Dan, the band, Max.
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Right. And I remember once being pulled over by a cop because one of my lights was, it turned out, wasn't working at the back.
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I didn't know this, but my main thought as I had pulled in was that the guitar solo in Kid Charlemagne was about to come up and would it be bad for him to sit in the car with the windows up just enjoying this incredible Steely Dan guitar solo
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while the cop respectfully waited outside to ask me for my license? I am on a slightly similar note, would always have Spotify on shuffle and believe it or not, some music I like is good, but some isn't.
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And I was driving into Sky Sports and absentmindedly, I wound down the window to the security man to wave my pass at just the moment where the chorus from Aladdin's I Can Show You The World was playing at full volume.
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This is from Willow, 1905, four days ago. One star. That is just before you really bring me down now.
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That's your flaw with drive-by shootings. They always know that you've done a drive-by because they hear the sound of Aladdin blaring from the car as you roll down the window.
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I Can Show You The World. Willow says, four days ago, one star, middle class.
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This is the concentrate you dilute to make middle class banter. Thanks, Willow. That's nice, isn't it?
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Ginger Topper, 567, gives us five stars and says, love the pod. Would it be possible to have a guest that doesn't live in Brighton?
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So that isn't helping us with Willow. 1905, is it? Let's face it. Welcome all feedback, positive or negative, of course.
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Next guest, today's guest is James Acaster. I sort of feel we don't need to introduce James Acaster.
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People know James Acaster. But, you know, we do have some listeners who have come via me through football and, you know, who live in sort of Puerto Rico.
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Don't know any of the guests. And so we should say, like, he's one of the most famous comedians in Britain at the moment.
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Is that fair to say? I mean, one of the highest accolades you can give to, you know, he's still young.
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And he's such as his influence that I remember once going to a small gig in London and at least three of the people on the bill were trying to be James Acaster.
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Right. He's kind of exploded in the last few years, but he's doing other things.
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He was in the Ghostbusters movie, the last one. And yeah, he's doing his own beautiful stuff, releasing albums and recordings himself and making strange podcasts.
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And his show at the moment that I think he's about to record and release is one of the best comedy shows I've seen in the last few years.
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Yeah, he's a touchstone, Max. Also hosts Off Menu, of course, with Ed Gamble. I'll tell you my embarrassing Off Menu story, David, is when the pandemic just started, I thought I'd DM Off Menu and say,
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look, I'm not anybody, but I have got the kit. So I can do it if you're desperate.
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And then like the next three people I had were like Al Pacino, Oprah and Barack Obama.
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And I was like, oh, they didn't reply. But you know, that's okay. My food tastes are pretty bland.
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But anyway, I didn't know I was too embarrassed to say that to James. But here we go.
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Here is episode 10, What You Did Yesterday with James Acaster. James Acaster, welcome to What Did You Do Yesterday?
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Thanks for coming on. Thank you so much. Hello. Hello, guys. What time did it all begin for you?
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Yesterday. Yes, please. James, we don't care about any other day. We don't care about any other day.
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No interest in any other day. Did you wake up naturally or did you use some sort of alarm to wake you up yesterday, James?
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I was woken up by cats. We have four cats. I was woken up by them at five yesterday.
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And then I went back to sleep at about seven. And then I woke up at, you know, not too proud to admit it, half ten.
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That's really good. And replied to your text message to ask me to do this.
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Between five and seven, were you just playing with cats? No, I was trying to get the cats to leave me alone and let me sleep.
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Here's the thing. We could close our bedroom door, but we can't for ourselves to do it.
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So it is our own fault. And then they come in and it is adorable that they want to come in and play.
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But it means that, yeah, we wake up earlier than we'd like. And then seven is when we feed them.
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And then they leave us alone. Seven. Does a cat, want something, you know the way if a baby's crying, generally there's something, they're too hot or too cold.
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But do you know cats well enough that you can immediately just be like, I see what you need, son.
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Yeah. Well, it's either food, play, they want to play, or they want a dump.
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They won't really let you know if they want a wee. That doesn't really need communicating.
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But when they want a shit, they properly kind of get a bit like, I don't know what's happening to me.
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And they come up to you like that. So like, that's, that's a bit more urgent, but like, do they have to ask permission to do a shit though?
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Like, can they not just go and do it? Not at all. They don't have to ask permission.
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I think there's a couple of them who when they need a shit, they don't like it.
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They don't like how it feels inside them. And they kind of come up to us being like, don't make me go through this again.
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I don't want to do this whole thing. And then once they've had the shit, they run around the house really excited and they're like loving it.
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Yeah. I think cats, part of it is they don't like to do it in public.
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I don't know if they're indoor cats or if you let them out or if the litter tray is sort of round a corner that would give them the privacy that maybe that's the problem.
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They say, I don't want you to look at me. They're indoor cats, but there's like, we turned the balcony into a catio.
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I don't even know what a catio is. I'm putting two and two together. Yeah.
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But part of the catio is quite a huge box that they can climb into with a roof and everything that has a cat litter tray in it.
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They've got their privacy in there. That's nice. So if you need to change those shits, do you have to follow them?
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Like climb up through little tubes and stuff, dress in a cat costume? Luckily the lid comes off, but it would be good if we had a little underground tube.
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So we kind of come in from the underneath. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle and come up from that.
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So I quite like it for the neighbours. It would be like, you know, when you're at the zoo and you see the ranger is in the leopard's enclosure.
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Oh, that's a brave. That would be you in a sort of ranger's outfit, just changing the litter tray.
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Yeah, I do put on a ranger's outfit. Actually, I dress like one of David's characters from his children's book, Noel's Own.
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You've got a boiler suit. You've got a bum bag. You've got a helmet worn at all times.
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He's conscious of danger in the world and what to do if a shark comes up out of the loo while you're sitting on it.
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Normally it takes about 45 minutes to get to 10.30. This is quite exciting that we're so far into the day.
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So you wake naturally at 10.30? Well, I did yesterday because of it. Really, do you know what?
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In an ideal world, and I sometimes manage this, I wake up at seven. Feed the cats, and then I get on with my day.
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That's what I'd like to do. But yesterday I wasn't so lucky. It's real CEO vibes to get up that early.
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It's real power play. Just because of the cats, man. And because I saw Stormzy get interviewed by Louis Farouk and say he wakes up at six and walks the dogs,
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and that's how his day starts. I'm like, man, Stormzy's really got it together. It made me feel bad.
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I think I'm Stormzy every morning because of whatever time I wake up, I just compare it to...
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To Stormzy. Yeah. So what happens at 10.30? 10.30, I wake up, I look at my phone, I have a text from David.
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Yeah. Saying, do you want to do a podcast of mine? Stop! James, this is like prime directive.
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This is like Back to the Future where you're letting the past into... You know what I mean?
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Like, you're not supposed to change the events of the past while you've gone back in time.
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Just be careful with putting this sort of stuff into this. This whole thing could collapse.
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No, I'm interested because presumably, you know, you get quite a lot of messages from...
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Friends, acquaintances saying, could you do this thing for us? When you got a message from David saying, could you do this podcast tomorrow?
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Did you think, I don't want to... Do we need to go into this? I'm interested to know.
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This is James's day. I'm currently in a phase where I just say a blanket no to any podcast just because I do my own one too much.
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And it was getting ridiculous. I was just saying yes to all the podcasts and that was my whole life.
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So I haven't done any for ages. And today is completely wide open. So when I got the text, from David, I thought, yeah, that'll be fun.
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I'll do that. It's an hour. And also I thought, oh, it's at nine o'clock.
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That'll mean I won't be a lazy so-and-so like today and wake up at half ten.
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So that'll be great. I'll do that. That'll make me wake up at nine. I mean, it didn't.
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I slept in. And I've inconvenienced you guys for about 20 minutes. But like, you know.
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But the emotion was a positive one. Yeah, I thought that'd be good. And it's no prep.
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I can talk about what I do today. And I don't need to put it in my diary.
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I'll definitely. How dare you? This is me and Max are operating off a script with this all exactly printed out.
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Yeah, just as regards to you doing too many podcasts. I just thought the three hour Andrew Tate one you did was a mistake.
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Like you got into some pretty gnarly stuff there. And if I was your manager.
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With Tate or about Tate? Because I've done both. I've done David had already reacts to James Acaster on Andrew Tate.
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Which is. A three hour YouTube of just me nodding at the camera and shaking my head a lot.
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Yeah. What's the cats total at the moment? Or have you never tottered them all up?
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We've got four cats. Wow. We won't get any more. Yeah. One of them is currently in here really because I'm in what is essentially the playroom.
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One of them is really confused as to why I'm not playing with him. Right.
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If I'm in the playroom. Because I'm the best at playing. My arm's at 1030. You get the text.
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You're still in bed. So I presume you reply straight away thinking this is. I've made it.
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We did reply pretty quickly. I replied pretty quick. Yeah. I did think I'd made it.
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I can even read it to you verbatim. Yeah. It starts off in caps lock, David's text, and then it drops off.
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I don't know what. Jimmy, can you do our podcast tomorrow morning? Brackets. And then lowercase Wednesday.
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And then back to caps lock at 9am for an hour. Full stop. It is me and Max Rushden.
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We're in normal lowercase now. And we ask you what you did yesterday. Brackets, which would be today.
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Because he thinks I'm a fucking idiot. So I said, yeah. Okay. To be fair, I didn't reply very quick.
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He sent me that at 8. It's 10.35. I say, yeah, okay. Okay, great. In caps lock.
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Back to lowercase. Remember everything you did today. Give me an email for the Zoom.
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Yeah. Give him an email. I said, I'm going to remember everything. He said, in caps lock, 9am, baby.
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Thanks so much. And then I hearted that. Oh, really nice. You didn't do the heart.
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Because I sometimes just press heart and send. Oh, yeah. Rather than hearting the message.
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But the awkwardness of that is sometimes you press heart and it's like some sad news and you're reacting to it and the heart has a sort of pulse on it.
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You know, you don't want to send a pulsing heart to like my granddad's dead.
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No, no. Right, so you heart the message. Okay, so you're good. You set up some plans for the next day.
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Can I just make on a literary point here? I've embraced caps, but I've tried to take, if you like, the fury out of caps.
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So just I put the important bits in caps. You'll notice there. That's the style that I'm going for.
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And I also want to grab you at the start. Jimmy, will you do our podcast tomorrow?
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That's the important bit there. Because every message he's getting is, can you come on a podcast?
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So yours has to stand out amidst all the other messages. And it did. And it worked.
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It did. It did grab me immediately. The caps was like, this guy, he doesn't seem furious, but he's trying to get something across.
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Enthusiasm. I'm trying to get enthusiasm across. Is that illegal in this day and age?
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Are we not allowed to be excited for things? Anymore? I'm like one of your bloody cats coming in at 7am.
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Okay, so do you get out of bed after you've replied to David? No, I mean, I can be honest about what I did as soon as I replied to David, if you want me to.
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Please. I Googled Max Rushden. What came up? What's the first thing that comes up when you Google Max Rushden?
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People also search for Barry Glendenning. To the listeners, Max and Barry do various football, but if anything happens in football and you need someone to talk about it for over three hours,
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they are the guys. Whatever it is, Brighton have changed their badge, something like that.
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Let's get the boys on here to examine it from every possible fucking angle. This feels like quite a self-indulgent question now, James, but how long did you spend on the Google?
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And like, for somebody who has no idea who I am if they did Google me for a certain amount of time, did you come out with a positive or a negative reaction?
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This is so sad. This is the low point of podcasting. Well, I was on it for very long.
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I saw that it said you were a journalist and broadcaster and it said the people also searched for, and one of the people also searched for was Tim Lovejoy.
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So then I was like, I am going to have to look at this a bit longer because I don't want the Lovejoy on my hands as much as I've enjoyed being interviewed by Tim.
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Scrolled for a bit longer and I was mainly skimming, if I'm honest, so that you've done Soccer AM in the past and that you write for The Guardian.
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And then there was a photo of, I think a tweet or, sometimes you get your wife to say what she thinks the score is going to be for the football.
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That's good. That's really good stuff. And then there was a photo of like, what either was or is, but definitely was, your Twitter picture of you with your nosebleed, I guess.
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Yeah, yeah, I've got a nosebleed, yeah. And I remembered that from my days on Twitter.
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I was like, oh, I've seen that picture before. And I think retweeted by good people.
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Right. So I was like, I think he did some funny tweets. Ultimately, James, the worst situation would be you would have Googled me and then replied in caps lock to David to say,
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actually, I don't want to do this podcast. I changed my mind. I have nothing planned tomorrow.
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I would be of no use to you. So Tim Lovejoy interview. I mean, it didn't happen yesterday, so we can't really get into it.
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Number of times, number of times on Sunday brunch. Yeah, yeah. I've been on Sunday brunch.
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I've done the brunch. I once did the brunch the morning after a breakup. Oh, really?
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Yeah, it was with Johnny Wilkinson's kicking coach. I didn't know you broke up with Johnny Wilkinson's kicking coach.
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I thought you guys were still together. He's very thorough. Everything moves very slowly. It's very ordered.
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My biggest tweet ever was, it was when England lost in football to Iceland and watching the match, because, you know, I don't care about, they're not my team, so I was able to have a distance and I did a tweet.
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It was like, basically, Star Wars doesn't work in Icelandic because Luke's name is Luke Vader's son.
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Like, you know the way you get the name of your father. Yeah, that's really good.
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Yeah, but loads of people got on. There was some mistake. I think it was, it should be called Luke Darth's son or something, you know, that sort of like, that was a classic Twitter thing.
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That's a fun response to a joke. Yeah. Yeah. So how long do you lie in bed having...
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I get out pretty quickly after Googling Max Rushden. You have to shower immediately. You have to wash that away.
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I need to get out of bed. Can't be Googling this guy. So yeah, I've got to get out of bed pretty soon after that.
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Okay. And what happens? Where'd you go? So then I'm shower. Yeah. Then I've got a meeting in central London.
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So I went to have some food with some people. Sorry, just one thing there.
24:05 - 24:10
I could imagine you don't... I'm not saying a cold shower, but a medium shower.
24:10 - 24:16
I could see you being a mid-shower guy. No, I like it warm. I like it hot.
24:16 - 24:21
I mean, going back to Tim Lovejoy, he loves a cold shower. He loves Wim Hof.
24:21 - 24:25
He loves that stuff. Oh, really? Yeah, yeah. There's one man I don't have to Google.
24:25 - 24:33
I know a lot about him. I like a hot shower. I could have aspired to one day being a cold shower person.
24:33 - 24:40
I think that sounds really good. I don't think so. I can't do it. Yeah, so do you eat anything at home before you go to...
24:40 - 24:44
Not yesterday because I knew I had this... We were going to eat at the...
24:44 - 24:50
It was going to be like a meal slash meeting. Oh, wow. A meal-ting. How did you get there?
24:50 - 24:57
Oh, great. I got there on the overground and the underground. And if you want to make a Womble's joke, you can.
24:57 - 25:03
It's up to you. The door's open. Yeah. For anyone. It was wide open for a Womble's joke.
25:03 - 25:06
That's how I got there. Got there in record time. Got there a bit early.
25:06 - 25:09
They were earlier than me, the people I was meeting. So they were already there.
25:09 - 25:14
So I got there thinking, oh, this is great because I woke up quite late today, but I'm early for this meeting.
25:14 - 25:21
But then they were there, so I don't get any of the credit. Pretty sweet trick, though, to go for the lunch meeting.
25:21 - 25:28
You know what I mean? If I know you, it was a three and a half stars up restaurant.
25:28 - 25:37
So even if the meeting turns out to be bullshit, if they're like, it's got two wheels and when you lean forward, it moves forward.
25:37 - 25:42
And you're just like, that's the Segway. It's been invented already. Let's eat. Like you are getting.
25:42 - 25:49
You think they're pitching the Segway to me? Yeah. So like they've invented something and I'm going to be the face of it.
25:51 - 25:58
You'd be a really good front person for a new mode of transport, I think.
25:58 - 26:03
Yeah. I feel like I would actually. I'd love to be the front person for a new mode of transport.
26:03 - 26:09
So what was the genre of food you ate during the meeting? Good question. Went to a place called Rovi, which is an Ottolenghi place.
26:09 - 26:16
Oh yeah. Cold. Cold food, please. One of the people was a vegetarian, so a lot of vegetarian stuff.
26:16 - 26:25
All nice and hot. Chickpea chips. Wow. This onion that. It sounds boring, but it was pretty amazing, whatever they put on this onion.
26:25 - 26:30
But it was just an onion. Just an onion. It was delicious. Wow. Burrata, can't go wrong.
26:30 - 26:35
Me and the other guy had a cod between us. Had some salted cod between us.
26:35 - 26:39
Made it sound like you had a whole cod. Yeah, a whole cod. I mean, we met in the middle like Lady and the Tramp.
26:39 - 26:44
Which is bold at a meeting. If I was in front of commissioners, I would avoid eating a whole cod.
26:44 - 26:51
Yeah. Look, I feel we're veering into James's podcast now. Yeah. So we will move beyond.
26:51 - 26:58
So we've had this meeting. Now, it was quite an early meeting. So now it's that strange thing.
26:58 - 27:05
Sometimes, like we're recording this in the morning. I'll be kind of turbo-razzed after this.
27:05 - 27:14
Because of the pace of the podcast, David, is that? No, because like in a normal day, I would just be doing emails and stuff now.
27:14 - 27:21
Whereas I've had to fully wake up to engage with you chumps. And so there's a real.
27:21 - 27:24
There's a real opportunity. I'll probably go for a cycle or something like that after this.
27:24 - 27:29
Will you go back and just wrestle the cats for a few hours? After the meeting?
27:29 - 27:34
Oh, yeah. No, no. So I deliberately asked for the meeting to be near my agent's office.
27:34 - 27:39
So I could go there and get a load of admin done. So I blasted for a bunch of admin.
27:39 - 27:46
Can we nail down on what admin it was? I'm interested in admin. Three different types of admin I had to do.
27:46 - 27:54
I had to sign a bunch of stuff. Because I'd done a. I did a tour show in Truro.
27:54 - 28:00
I did four tour shows in Truro. And the first two were like the best gigs of the tour.
28:00 - 28:05
So I quickly threw together a camera crew and asked if I could film the fourth one on the fourth night.
28:05 - 28:10
And the venue said yes. And they didn't charge us extra. And they said, just do a few things for us.
28:10 - 28:15
And one was sign a whole bunch of stuff and send it to us. So I did that yesterday.
28:15 - 28:21
And wrote how much I love Truro and all of it. Because I do. It's the high point of my career, I think.
28:21 - 28:33
Playing in Truro. I'm not even exaggerating. Interesting. Sometimes I've known people in the past to have recorded, say, shows in venues where they've had a really good gig in the past.
28:33 - 28:38
But the problem was the gig in the past used up all of the super fans.
28:38 - 28:47
So now you're left with a sort of less appreciative group. So it actually, the recording turns out to be a bit lumpy.
28:47 - 28:53
How did the recording turn out? Best night of my life. Wow. I mean, we're a reduced camera crew.
28:53 - 28:58
So, you know, I don't know how usable it is. It looks like it's usable.
28:58 - 29:03
But, like, I was just like, we've got to take advantage of this. This venue's hot.
29:03 - 29:11
The audience are hot. And I wasn't feeling as sulky as usual. So I was like, let's absolutely film this.
29:11 - 29:19
Absolutely loved it. Stop going on about Truro. So it was my pleasure to sign that merch for them yesterday and send it over.
29:19 - 29:25
Okay. So you had to sign a lot of. Just Truro-based things. You had two more bits of admin to do with your agent.
29:25 - 29:31
Then I had to get an NDA written up so that I could send it to people.
29:31 - 29:36
Is it about this podcast or? Yeah, because you guys are allowed to broadcast it.
29:36 - 29:38
I'm going to tell you all of it, but then I'll send it to you.
29:38 - 29:42
You can't tell people what I did yesterday. So, yeah, I did the NDA. Great.
29:42 - 29:51
And that's exciting. Yeah. Non-disclosure agreement. So, sorry, let me just. You've got people to do something, and then you need them not to tell anyone about it.
29:51 - 29:59
Yeah. Oh, that's so tantalizing. I've never had to do that in my life. When you Googled Max, journalist would have been one of his first things.
29:59 - 30:05
He's itching to really go in deep here. But because I want to get the overview of the day, I'm not really.
30:05 - 30:13
You can't be allowed to. I mean, NDAs are either exciting professional things or you've committed quite a serious crime and paid someone off.
30:13 - 30:17
It's one of the two. Yeah. We just don't know. What's the third thing, James?
30:17 - 30:31
Third thing is I had to punch up. A pitch document for another TV idea because we're pitching it this week and I had to do all the final notes for it pre-pitch.
30:31 - 30:40
Max, I know what you're thinking here, but punch up in comedy means maybe put a few more jokes, put a bit more momentum into it.
30:40 - 30:48
Not like me and my football world, just decking people. Just decking. I understand. Thanks for bringing it to a non-comedian space there.
30:48 - 30:57
I appreciate that. Are you good at? Are those pitching type things, James? I think I am because I get into them and I assume that I'm not going to get commissioned.
30:57 - 31:04
So I just try and do as good a pitch as I can that really sums up exactly what it is and throw myself into it.
31:04 - 31:11
So if you half-ass it, you hate it. It's awful to do that. So instead, I just fully go into it.
31:11 - 31:19
I've only pitched one show, which I really liked, called Big Things, where I just went to the biggest car, hat, building.
31:20 - 31:26
And my agent was like, Max, this is so shit. You cannot go to another meeting with – I think people will like this idea.
31:26 - 31:30
And then Richard Hammond made the show. I was like, there you go. It's a show.
31:30 - 31:33
It works. But at the end of the meeting – Hang on, he made you a show?
31:33 - 31:38
No, he just made a – I hadn't patented the word big or things, unfortunately.
31:38 - 31:43
You should have called it To The Max. Yeah, I should have done. Big Things.
31:43 - 31:46
But at the end of those meetings, they say, what else are you interested in?
31:46 - 31:50
And I think in my mind, I'm like, I'm definitely interested in loads of things.
31:50 - 31:59
Right now, I can't think of anything. And so I sit there sort of silent, you know, a bit like in a sort of university tutorial where you haven't done any work.
31:59 - 32:05
You're like, oh, fuck. But I presume, like, maybe you're a level they don't have to ask you that.
32:05 - 32:16
No, they ask that. One of the worst ones I ever had, I'd gone to America and done a round of meetings, and then I went again the following year, and I sat down with the production company, and they said,
32:16 - 32:22
so what ideas have you got? And I pitched them this thing, and they said, you said that to us last year.
32:22 - 32:36
I was like, oh, and they went, anything else? I was like, no. And then we had to sit there while I thought about how close Magnolia Bakery is so I could get some banana pudding as soon as we'd finished this.
32:36 - 32:46
I once pitched another one of my stupid Antarctic Explorer ideas. When are we going to get more Antarctic Explorers on the box?
32:46 - 32:52
But it was clear that they'd only taken the meeting to then ask me to do something afterwards.
32:52 - 32:56
Would I be interested in this? We've got one for you, David. We fixed our bicycle.
32:56 - 33:02
And Max, I'd say you have been offered some real dog shit in your time.
33:02 - 33:11
Oh, yeah. But this was the Apprentice for Pets was the top line pitch, and they didn't even want me to present it.
33:11 - 33:18
I was just like the roving reporter at the back with the mic after the chihuahua has failed to juggle.
33:18 - 33:22
I have to go up to. Presumably the owner is as opposed to the dog.
33:22 - 33:27
I'd just be like, you must be absolutely gutted with how it led to there.
33:27 - 33:35
Did this show ever make it? This is a great idea. So what they'd get like a few, like a dog and a cat and a gerbil who think they're the best salespeople in Europe.
33:35 - 33:47
Yeah. And then make themselves, you know, do an advertising campaign for L'Oreal. Yeah. I mean, dog sledding is the only job I can think of that dogs actually do.
33:47 - 33:54
I guess seeing eye dogs there also. Yeah. That's a job. I know, but they're not really competitive in a way that you want people.
33:54 - 34:01
I'm the best bloody seeing eye dog in this city. Watch as I take this person through this really dangerous thoroughfare.
34:01 - 34:11
I don't think they're braggy like that. That would be a good show if it was just seeing eye dogs and the assault courses get more and more like dangerous.
34:11 - 34:15
But are they taking the person with them versus the dog on their own? Yeah.
34:15 - 34:20
For what it doesn't prove their skills. Right. I see. It's like who the best seeing eye dog is.
34:20 - 34:26
Right. Niagara Falls here, like, you know, day eight. People watch that. Yeah, true. I said, do you have any other idea?
34:26 - 34:32
You pitched that to us last year, Jess. Pitch it every year. Seeing eye dog Olympics.
34:32 - 34:41
Mum? What is it? Are we there yet? Hello there. It's me, Harry Hill, with some exciting news.
34:41 - 34:50
I've got a brand new podcast. It's called Are We There Yet? and is the world's first family-friendly podcast that's designed to get you from A to B.
34:50 - 35:00
Join me, my son, Gary. Hello. Sarah, the AI bot. Hello, Harry. As we delve into the childhood memories of a motley crew of comedians, celebrities and cultural icons.
35:00 - 35:11
Is it on now, Daddy? Yes, Gary, it is. I'll be there yet. When I was on local radio, I often had to do stories about dog shit.
35:11 - 35:16
In fact, once I'd just lost the breakfast show on BBC London and replaced by Paul Ross.
35:16 - 35:24
And the next day I had to go out reporting and do dog shit. And I was there with my little microphone and a bloke.
35:24 - 35:31
Interviewing a shit? Not quite that bad. A man's dog had done a shit and he hadn't picked it up.
35:31 - 35:35
And I said, hey, look, are you going to pick it up? And he just looked at me and I looked official enough.
35:35 - 35:46
I didn't. So he just picked up with his bare hands and walked off. It was a desperate time for me.
35:46 - 35:50
OK, we're out of the. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Sorry. We're out of the agent. I'd say that's taken.
35:50 - 35:54
It's taken an hour and a half. Yeah, where are we? So 2 p.m.? No, no, it's later than that.
35:54 - 36:01
OK. The meal was quite a while. So, yeah, I think it's like approaching four o'clock.
36:01 - 36:06
This is a fun time of the day here. Just before dinner, the bewitching hour, as I call it.
36:06 - 36:11
Yeah. That's my own name for it. What do you do, James? What do you do with that little bit?
36:11 - 36:21
I walk from Tottenham Court Road to Highbury and Islington. That's quite a walk. I decide I'm going to do that walk and then get the train home from there.
36:21 - 36:28
I mean, I feel like I don't want obsessive comedy fans being able to triangulate where I live from this podcast.
36:28 - 36:33
Anyway, I'll get the train home from there. That's a walk. That's a good, what, 40 minutes?
36:33 - 36:38
If I've got the time, I'll get the steps in, do the walks. It's a nice day yesterday.
36:38 - 36:45
Do you listen to anything? Yeah, I'm listening to the greatest playlist I've ever made throughout the whole tour that I've been doing.
36:45 - 36:54
I've been touring now for about two years, and I've been just gradually building a playlist of, you know, they have to just be favorite songs of all time, best songs ever.
36:54 - 36:59
Great. It has to be the best playlist ever. Every song's got to flow perfectly into the next one.
36:59 - 37:07
Every song's got to be brilliant. Every song's got to potentially be someone's favorite song, and it's what I've been doing in the car in my downtime on the tour.
37:07 - 37:24
Great. So I am constantly running a playlist of the month that I throw songs onto that I like, and they're all called A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-July, A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A, to keep them at the top of the list of playlists so I don't have to go down too far.
37:24 - 37:29
Do you remember me looking at your playlist in your car, David? Oh, yeah, I do remember this, actually.
37:29 - 37:34
The last time James was in Dublin, I thought it would be a bit of fun.
37:34 - 37:39
We would go to Europe's largest city center park and try and find the deer.
37:39 - 37:52
Now, the mistake I'd made was that it was rush hour. It was approaching rush hour, so there was a general bit of stress in the air and we couldn't find the deer.
37:52 - 38:00
So what's meant to be a very relaxed, fun thing became just like, shut up in the back, we're going to keep going till we find the deer.
38:00 - 38:12
And then he got deep into my phone playlists and you found pretty much the worst tunes more than...
38:12 - 38:25
No, I found a lot of different playlists, but they all were kind... Kind of just the same songs in different orders and it was quite the insight into you because it was like different years and they were called like different show walk-ins,
38:25 - 38:29
like this is for this festival I'm doing or whatever. But it was a lot of the same songs.
38:29 - 38:33
I was like, David, every playlist is like four or five songs and that's it.
38:33 - 38:38
And it's the same songs just in a different order every time. And you were like, don't ever go at my playlists.
38:38 - 38:43
Don't ever go at them. I'm looking for the deer. You've got Never Stop by The Bad Plus.
38:43 - 38:55
So what these are, Max, so I feel for pre-show music, not walk on, but just while the people are sitting down, you want really strong backbeat, but mid tempo.
38:55 - 39:01
The mistake that comedy clubs always used to make, they'd be like, let's get ready to rumble.
39:01 - 39:08
You know what I mean? And it's just like, this art cannot possibly live up to the expectations that this playlist have built.
39:08 - 39:18
So I found this, yes, Laura Turinel by Sebastian Tellier, which is used in Goal of the Month a lot of the time but actually on my greatest playlist of all time.
39:18 - 39:27
No way. Wow. So maybe I did feed some ideas through to you in this really tense drive around while we were trying to find some deer.
39:27 - 39:37
Well, I would say, David, I've sat in a theater, I'd say three times waiting for you to come on stage and I've never, ever noticed the music.
39:37 - 39:44
So that's exactly what you want, right? Isn't it? No, I want people to sit there in ecstasy.
39:45 - 39:54
When I forget my music playing device in venues, a lot of the time I'll just say, just play, let it be the album by the Beatles.
39:54 - 40:01
Cause I quite like that as an album. And then there's a funny kind of Russian roulette thing is what song we'll be playing as I walk out.
40:01 - 40:08
What's funny is sometimes it's like across the universe or some quite slow song as I walk out.
40:08 - 40:13
Long and Winding Road is on that album, isn't it? Yes. Yes, it is. You don't want to walk onto that.
40:15 - 40:22
The leads to your door. I think that's good stuff, but I really enjoy opening my show with the lines.
40:22 - 40:29
Shut up Beatles. It's time for David O'Doherty. That's good. That is good. So what's, can we have a flavor of the playlist?
40:29 - 40:31
I mean, that's what people listen to this. We want to know is what is.
40:31 - 40:36
Sure. I mean, the playlist is like 22 hours long at this point. Okay. We probably don't need all of it.
40:36 - 40:41
You don't want all of it? Okay. If you want to read out. Put it in the show notes.
40:41 - 40:47
Yeah. Put it in the show notes. Okay. So I'll just like scroll to a random bit.
40:47 - 40:53
Oh yeah. So it's like a little hip hop section here. So you got bombs over Baghdad by outcast black history month by soul Williams.
40:53 - 40:57
Oh my darling. Don't cry. Run the jewels. Lost ones. Lauren Hill, black ego, diggable planets.
40:57 - 41:05
Then into after laughter comes tears by Wendy Renee. That blends in quite nicely. Then ganja smothering by Ika mouse.
41:05 - 41:11
My favorite reggae songs looking for all, all rendered truth, Lonnie Holly. And then we're into it like a, a slower bit.
41:11 - 41:18
Bad plus is on here actually, David. So I just, Boris tunes on and the list gets longer and longer.
41:18 - 41:27
Whereas you were actually taking us through like 22 hours is nearly a whole day. James, I don't know if you realize that I've decided to stop when it gets to a day.
41:27 - 41:39
And also, so it's currently 323 songs, 21 hours and 44 minutes. Now the dream is that I get to 24 hours and it's 365 songs.
41:39 - 41:43
And then I've got a song for each day of the year and it lasts a day.
41:43 - 41:54
That would be the dream. I didn't know any of those songs. I basically just put on nineties classics and wait for the new radicals skip through until the new radicals and I can get on my day.
41:54 - 41:59
Now listen, I'm not like I haven't considered the new radicals because I do like that song.
41:59 - 42:04
Yeah. You probably know some of these matches. This is a more like top loader.
42:04 - 42:10
If top loader isn't on there, he's not going to know. Oh Jesus. This is not Russian friendly.
42:10 - 42:17
Actually. I have this fear that cause cause during the Soccer AM Glory Years, we had every indie band, every indie band came on.
42:17 - 42:20
Right. And I just thought my biggest fear was being put in a room with all of them.
42:20 - 42:25
I wouldn't be able to leave them until I'd put them all together. Like I'd have to get editors all together.
42:25 - 42:33
The cribs look like Henry the third, but they were quite easy to pick as a bad, you know, they'll have to get the wombats all together and the Maccabees.
42:33 - 42:36
And it was sort of, can you tell me a long time to dish out.
42:36 - 42:51
So like, um, the way that your son might build four piece jigsaws, but from a box that has three, four piece jigsaws in it, I mean, the fear would be that you'd put like four bass players together in one band and they would all just be like,
42:51 - 42:55
when they went to do a gig. Now that would get on James's playlist though.
42:55 - 42:59
The old four bass players would be on the playlist. So you've got home James.
42:59 - 43:10
Yeah. I got home and now it's time to exercise. Actually, first of all, I go on my laptop and I alter the playlist a bit because I've listened to it on a walk.
43:10 - 43:14
I've got a couple of notes. I'll move some songs around and take some songs out.
43:14 - 43:20
So I sync it with my phone. Now the great version of the playlist is on the phone.
43:20 - 43:31
You've just exercised. You've just exercised though. Yeah. I've just done a walk, but like now I've got a heavy lifting time because the previous week, last week, my friend came and stayed for the week and every day was just carnage.
43:31 - 43:36
Right. So I'm trying to get back to being a bit healthier this week. Okay.
43:36 - 43:45
So what's your exercise? What's the, what are you doing? Yoga 20 minutes. I've got these resistance bands that I do like stuff on for, for 20 minutes.
43:45 - 43:50
And then I'm at the gym on yesterday. It was a cross trainer for half an hour.
43:50 - 43:57
It's nothing crazy. Do you think a cross trainer is, I reckon you could be on there for like five days and not notice that you'd been on it.
43:57 - 44:03
Well, are you capable of pushing your max is really fit. I'm not. Yeah. Of course trainer.
44:03 - 44:07
Yeah. I make sure I choose the right amount of resistance. I've got to feel it.
44:07 - 44:14
Yeah. Okay. I'm going to say the cats fucking hate yoga. I would imagine the cats are like, what the hell is going on?
44:14 - 44:22
They like it. Okay. We're sweating. Yeah. We're sweating after all that, particularly after the half hour of cross training then.
44:22 - 44:28
So you're going to have to come back. Have your second by I calculated your second shower of the day.
44:28 - 44:34
My second shower. Hello, old friend. You're washing off these essential oils. Yeah. Yeah. I'm rinsing it all off.
44:34 - 44:38
Oh no, actually before I even had the shower, cause I was pretty hungry after the work.
44:38 - 44:42
So I was like, I just, I kind of just had a standing at the fridge meal.
44:42 - 44:49
Oh, great. What's in it? Crazy. Looking back six pickled beetroot. So I was out the packet with a fork.
44:49 - 44:55
It's interesting. You take a fork to the fridge. Well, I would say most people wouldn't even take cutlery to the fridge for that.
44:55 - 45:01
Yeah. But these are beetroots are going to get absolutely plastered in beetroot juice. If you're not using the fork.
45:01 - 45:11
Are they in a jar? No, they're in like a plastic packet. So I've got to open that and keep it like, so it doesn't spill and get the forks in and then do all that.
45:11 - 45:17
And then pour the juice down the sink, rinse the packet out. James, what about your next wee wee?
45:17 - 45:26
Was there evidence of it? Oh yeah. Good point. No, I don't think that was, or I didn't look enough at the wee wee.
45:26 - 45:29
Can you take a photo of your next wee? We'll put it in the show notes.
45:29 - 45:34
Can do. So is it just a beetroot? Or is there a, did you go back to the fridge?
45:34 - 45:43
Also as I'm eating the beetroot, I'm really, I mean, this should be pointing more to more as my wee wee being red, red, because as I was eating the beetroot,
45:43 - 45:47
I looked at the, the fridge door and there's a massive bottle of Big Tom.
45:47 - 45:50
And I'm like, I'm going to drink out of that bottle, just straight out the bottle.
45:50 - 45:56
And it was glugging the Big Tom. What is Big Tom? It's a Bloody Mary mix kind of thing.
45:56 - 46:00
Wow. But without booze. Wow. So I'm just drinking the tomato juice. I love it.
46:00 - 46:06
I hate this dinner. I hate beetroots. I don't, I don't hate it. I'll have it in a thing.
46:06 - 46:15
It tastes like muck. It tastes like a plowed field. Yeah. And then, yeah, for some reason, tomato juice is just, I'm on edge now with, yeah, it's mad.
46:15 - 46:22
And then at the end of that, I ate a load of salted cashews. They're not in the fridge, right?
46:22 - 46:28
Close the fridge. Remember there's some salted cashews in the cupboard. Yeah. And for, I'm going to have them.
46:28 - 46:38
I like the spontaneity though. Yeah. Yeah. I just, I just went nuts. It reminds me of a, your podcast partner, Ed Gamble type meal, where he'll be like, Oh no,
46:38 - 46:44
I have to have a 63 Brazil nuts and then six bags of popcorn. You know, what do you mean?
46:44 - 46:51
Like his specific diet for his gains that he needs to stay so hench. Yes.
46:51 - 46:57
Yeah. I did feel like Ed Gamble whilst doing it, but freestyling and just imagining, but this will probably help me.
46:57 - 47:04
I mean, probably none of that is very helpful at all. Can you strip naked after this, take a photo of yourself.
47:04 - 47:10
We'll put it in the show notes. Cause I think you might be really hedge now from this crazy diet.
47:10 - 47:16
Cause of the cashews and the tomato juice. Yeah. And in my mind, you're now covered in beetroot and tomato.
47:16 - 47:20
And it's a great, it is a great time to wash. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I had a shower.
47:20 - 47:29
I mean, I don't even know now what time of day it is. I mean, I think it's gotta be early evening and I'm not gonna lie.
47:29 - 47:37
I'm struggling to remember now what happens after this. Wow. It's early evening. It's when James Acaster comes alive.
47:37 - 47:42
Did you have a show yesterday? No. Okay. So you're at home. I think I played with the cats for a bit.
47:42 - 47:47
Cause definitely you got to do that. At some point, especially in the evening, we've got ultimate play set up here.
47:47 - 47:51
So is that a fishing rod with a fish with a plastic fish on the end?
47:51 - 48:01
Like that sort of stuff. That's rookie stuff. So basically there are a number of things that I've kind of like invented with them over the last year or so.
48:01 - 48:08
And now I put them all together. So there was a box, a cardboard box that they just liked that I don't even know what came in the box now.
48:08 - 48:17
Also I'd ordered online. It said it was a Snoopy suitcase. So I'd ordered that for my girlfriend and what, what arrived was a suitcase cover instead.
48:17 - 48:25
And I did check and it did say it was a suitcase online. And it also said it was a suitcase that said life is a journey on it.
48:25 - 48:29
And instead it was a suitcase cover with Snoopy on it that said life is journey.
48:29 - 48:40
And I obviously did not give her that for her birthday, but then found that if you put the suitcase cover over this cardboard box, the cats loved it.
48:40 - 48:44
They could kind of like stick their paws between the suit. Case cover in the box.
48:44 - 48:49
There was some holes where the handles for the suitcase were meant to go that I lined up with the mouth of the box.
48:49 - 48:57
They could jump in the box via that play with each other through that. And it became quite like the hit game in the house was box.
48:57 - 49:05
And they want to play box. I like that. Your, your last two Google searches were Max Rushden and Snoopy suitcase.
49:05 - 49:10
Yeah. I mean, for both of them, it said people also search for Tim Lovejoy.
49:10 - 49:18
So I don't know what that is. Then, there was a, this scrunchie kind of cat tunnel that Ed and Charlie gave us.
49:18 - 49:25
The cats had no interest in for a year. And then suddenly Terry really got into it and loved playing in the tunnel.
49:25 - 49:35
So there's that. And then there's this bag that is like a, a bag for life thing, but it's like this woven bag is quite rough and they love jumping in that as well.
49:35 - 49:43
So I've put all three of them together in like a triangle and I've got this stick and I just put the stick in different ones.
49:43 - 49:49
So in the box, in the tunnel, in the bag, and they're jumping between all three of them and I absolutely love it.
49:49 - 49:53
Yeah. When you said the sticker, I imagined that you actually sort of ruling with an iron fist.
49:53 - 49:59
Yeah. You know, the sticks getting pounced on relentlessly. Are all four cats interested in this or is one of them aloof?
49:59 - 50:05
And it's just like you dickheads. All four can get into it. I think all four of them did yesterday.
50:05 - 50:16
Usually we've got one who's a humongous cat and it's just aware that a tiger, if a game is happening and it's all in close proximity, he's probably going to do some damage.
50:16 - 50:20
So he tends to just go, I'm going to sit back and watch you guys play this.
50:20 - 50:25
It's like Lenny from A Mice and Men. Yeah. Yeah. He knows he doesn't want to pet people too hard.
50:25 - 50:31
He sits there and I'll tell him about tending the rabbits or whatever. One of your cats is one of those scrotum-y.
50:31 - 50:38
Well, see, immediately offensive. Scrotum-y. Okay. What's a better way of describing it? It's a sphinx cat called Terry.
50:38 - 50:43
A sphinx cat. Yes. He needs to be washed. Yes. Today's his bath day. I'm washing him.
50:43 - 50:52
I'm washing him today. If only, if only I'd sent that text today. Yeah. I should have washed him yesterday knowing that I was coming on this today.
50:52 - 50:55
That would have been better. Sorry. Forgive me. Why does he need? He's got no hair.
50:55 - 51:00
Right. Really? Right. So he can't wash himself. He gives it a good go. Yeah.
51:00 - 51:07
But he needs a hand. I have to wash him. I have to cover him in coconut oil and soapy water and give him a good old wash.
51:07 - 51:13
And then he really runs around the house excited. Kiss him. Just kiss him. And then just rub them all over.
51:13 - 51:20
You're hard barred. Yeah. So what time have we got to now? I mean, I appreciate that you've sort of lost track of time.
51:20 - 51:29
I can understand that. Definitely lost track of time. It's nine. It's 9pm. Because my evenings are getting more and more just because I'm not really watching anything at the minute.
51:29 - 51:35
Often when I'm on tour, I think a lot of comics have like something they regularly watch on tour.
51:35 - 51:38
I know, like just get into a TV series. And I weirdly don't do that.
51:38 - 51:43
I drop off of watching anything. I mainly just listen to music and seek out new.
51:43 - 51:49
Music all the time. So my evening becomes kind of, especially when I'm at home, actually play with the cats.
51:49 - 51:58
And then at half nine, I'm thinking, right, 10 o'clock's their biscuits. Then I kind of want to go to bed after that.
51:58 - 52:03
Oh, totally. The only time I'm stressed about TV is when I've run out of all the death and paradises.
52:03 - 52:10
I don't know what to do. The Chris Marshall one. Yeah. Chris Marshall. Ralph Little's just finished.
52:10 - 52:15
There's a new detective in town, but hopefully they'll stick pretty. Much to the tried and tested formula.
52:15 - 52:24
What he's done with all his death and paradises, just he puts top loader on, on repeat, dancing in the moonlight experiments with different pitches of it.
52:24 - 52:29
Sometimes he plays it as a sort of sad version of itself. They do a great acoustic version of that.
52:29 - 52:39
So 10 is biscuits. And then you just go to bed. Yeah. Well, actually I've got this new kind of like cooling face mask that I've started putting on before going to bed.
52:39 - 52:42
And I love it. What's this for? To get rid of the bags under my eyes.
52:43 - 52:50
It helps me get to sleep. It really chills me out. I don't think it's actually doing anything to my, how my face looks.
52:50 - 52:54
Do you have that feel on your face and then you take it off and go to bed or do you leave it on your face?
52:54 - 53:02
Yeah. Yeah. So I put it on for like, so I was listening to not music actually, but a Nardwire interview in Seth Rogen is what I was listening to.
53:02 - 53:07
So how long do you have the face pack on? 20 minutes. It's frozen. It comes out of the freezer.
53:07 - 53:11
Does it? The fridge. I just keep it in the fridge. Okay. Next to the beetroot.
53:11 - 53:20
It's the beetroot juice. It's the beetroot juice. Oh God. Disgusting. Okay. Do you, James, because you're off the road, you've had the true row experience.
53:20 - 53:32
Yeah. True romance as we're bad name for it. Do you get jazzed at eight o'clock because comedy has broken your brain from doing it for 15 years?
53:32 - 53:38
No, I think I used to, I used to, if I had a day off, cause I used to do it every night.
53:38 - 53:42
And then if I had a night off, I would be like, what do I do?
53:42 - 53:46
It's eight o'clock. No one's looking at me. Yeah. No. Now I absolutely love it.
53:46 - 53:55
I think lockdown completely cured me of that. Yeah. And now I get to that time of the evening and I'm like, this is the life I'm at home.
53:55 - 54:01
I'm playing what I'm at play. Do cats have had their biscuits? Do cats? I grew up around dogs.
54:01 - 54:09
I was raised, raised by dogs. Surprising no one. Dogs know you go to bed time now.
54:09 - 54:15
And a lot of the time you give them a biggie. And they get in their bed and they understand.
54:15 - 54:22
They're like, we get this. Whereas cats for me are so, they're like aliens. They just, they don't know me.
54:22 - 54:28
They don't understand where I'm coming from. Do your cats go to bed? Do you know what?
54:28 - 54:33
They went through phases of, they would go to bed after biscuits. They get the, okay, these guys are in bed now.
54:33 - 54:40
The lights are off. It's bedtime. So they definitely know when bedtime is. Which makes me resent their most recent behavior even more.
54:40 - 54:44
Because I'm pretty sure that they know it's bedtime. And they've decided they don't care.
54:44 - 54:56
Two of them in particular have started bombing in and out of, one of the problems is that the catio that I mentioned earlier is on the balcony that comes up from our bedroom.
54:56 - 55:02
There's the cat flap in the, in the door to get to it. And we've got our door open, which is our fault.
55:02 - 55:08
And they have started just absolutely taking as long a run up as they can.
55:08 - 55:13
So they'll go out into the corridor, into the guest room, into the far corner of that.
55:13 - 55:25
And then they run from there right round and then like cannonballing through the cat flap into the catio, then like meowing their head off, like really excited because they can't believe they've done it in the catio.
55:25 - 55:31
And then they bomb back through again and do the circuit again. And they started doing that, two of them, when we're trying to get to sleep.
55:31 - 55:39
And then there's a third one who then will tag in and swap places with one of them and they'll do it for a bit. But there's one of them who is constant.
55:39 - 55:43
Do you have, are there two cat flaps, one normal size one, and then one cat flap?
55:43 - 55:51
One sort of door for the larger. Yeah, no, there's one big one for all of them. Yeah, it kind of works, but we should, yeah, he should have his own little,
55:51 - 55:56
he should just open the screen door really though. My only real knowledge of cats is from Garfield.
55:56 - 56:04
Yeah. Do they like lasagna? Do they look forward to, is it Fridays or Mondays?
56:04 - 56:14
They hate Mondays. Garfield hates Mondays. Can't think of anything else about him. How did he sustain an entire career just based on those two, lasagna and Mondays?
56:14 - 56:21
Yeah. He kind of hates the dog, Odie, who lives with him, but then also kind of likes him. They are friends. Yeah.
56:21 - 56:25
There's not like a great deal of stuff, but that's all you need with Garfield really.
56:25 - 56:30
He loves lasagna and he hates Mondays. I think they would love lasagna if we put some lasagna down for them.
56:30 - 56:43
The big one definitely would eat it. He is very, very food motivated. So like, yeah, he would, he would like that. As for Mondays, I mean, what day is it today? It's Wednesday. The one who's in,
56:43 - 56:51
in the room with me now, which is the one that doesn't have hair, definitely is sulking that it's Wednesday and I'm working and I'm not playing with him. But why does Garfield hate Mondays?
56:51 - 57:06
What quintessential difference? This is like the worst piece of standup. Like I'd say 25 years late with this observation, but like unless Garfield has a job. Yeah.
57:06 - 57:13
Well the thing is he actually, the reason he is is because he was the first out in the apprentice pet and that was on him.
57:13 - 57:21
Monday. Yeah. And it's just stuck with him. I had to interview him afterwards. So he must be absolutely good at Garfield. Here's some lasagna.
57:21 - 57:27
So are you asleep now, James? Have you gone to bed? There's not, do we need to know anything specific about you going to bed routine?
57:27 - 57:36
How do you get to sleep? Do you know what I've started doing? I find it too instantly warm to be in the bed.
57:36 - 57:42
So I've started, I will sleep on top of the bed in my dressing gown.
57:42 - 57:50
Cause it's too cold on top of the bed without my dressing gown. So I'll start off on top of the bed with my dressing gown on.
57:50 - 57:57
And then at some point during the night, I rarely remember the moment. So it clearly happens when I'm in a daze.
57:57 - 58:03
I will shed the dressing gown and go under the covers. Unless the cats do it for you. You don't know that they sneak in.
58:03 - 58:17
Yeah, they might. Look, this is a fact-finding podcast where we learn from the lives of the great and the good and I hate to give advice, but get a lower-tog duvet.
58:17 - 58:24
You're obviously still running your winter duvet. It suits my girlfriend really well, that duvet that we've got.
58:24 - 58:28
I'm not going to get a lower-togger than she's cold. That is altruism of the highest order.
58:28 - 58:35
Sew two singles together. One is the higher-tog and then one is... It's just an idea.
58:35 - 58:42
Check the show notes, everyone. I'm going to be selling them soon. The David Igari twin.
58:43 - 58:49
David Igari-tog-er-ty. Really good. Really nice. And now you're asleep, James, which is the end of the day.
58:49 - 58:54
It was a good day. I think it was a good day, James. Yeah. I think it sounds quite good.
58:54 - 58:59
Now I'll say it back. It's all right. I'm a bit worried about how formless my evening is.
58:59 - 59:05
You know, I feel like... Do you think you spoiled dinner because you had those beetroot and because dinner's a nice moment?
59:05 - 59:09
Yeah, definitely. I mean, I didn't have dinner in the end. I just had that fridge meal.
59:09 - 59:16
But, like, you know, it seems like I got quite a lot done at my agent's office and then I just let the day not really be much.
59:16 - 59:28
I think that's the key. Like, the problem of the culture of achievement that we are in is that you have to feel like you've saved lives or something to have a reasonable day, whereas these days are, in fact, the days.
59:28 - 59:38
And if you can't find a bit of joy in that, when you think back on it, I'm not saying you have to pat yourself on the back, but you have to just be like, that was all right, wasn't it?
59:38 - 59:50
That was all right. Yeah, and I improved the playlist. Actually, when I listened to that, that Nardwaa, Seth Rogen interview, Seth Rogen mentioned that there's a Canadian rap song called Northern Touch,
59:50 - 59:54
which he said people outside of Canada don't know it, but it's like our stairway to heaven.
59:54 - 59:57
It's a really important song. I was like, that's going on the playlist. Oh, wow.
59:57 - 1:00:03
I listened to it. I loved it. Put it on the playlist. I might listen to it and then put the new Radicals on.
1:00:03 - 1:00:09
Oh, the Rascals. Okay. Well, look, you're asleep, so that's all we needed. That's all we need.
1:00:09 - 1:00:16
We're very happy. I'm glad you've had a nice day. Yeah. Well, I'm sitting. I'm signing the NDAs to you as we speak, so you'll be signing those.
1:00:16 - 1:00:25
Thank you. It's really bad for a podcast when one of the guests is NDA'd, so we just have to edit all of you out of this.
1:00:25 - 1:00:30
So it's just me and Max cracking wise occasionally. That's all we have. Yeah, I think that's fair.
1:00:30 - 1:00:46
We agree to it. Thanks, James. So that was episode 10, James Acaster. I enjoyed that bit so much, David.
1:00:46 - 1:00:54
You know I'm sort of masochistic, but I got a text from David and then I Googled you was a real high point for me so far in all of these episodes.
1:00:54 - 1:01:02
Too many cats. Too many cats. Maybe if he didn't have so many cats, he would know who you were then, Max.
1:01:02 - 1:01:08
Well, that's okay. I don't take it personally. You know, what is fame? It's nothing, really.
1:01:08 - 1:01:16
Fame is when you have a catio, a cat patio. Yeah. That is true. Really, you know, what this podcast is proving is we are all the same.
1:01:16 - 1:01:23
And so, you know, you're never too high and you're never too low. But I enjoyed that episode a great deal.
1:01:23 - 1:01:25
If you'd like to get in touch with the show, we do love your emails.
1:01:25 - 1:01:34
Here's how. To get in touch with the show, you can email us at whatdidyoudoyesterdaypod at gmail.com.
1:01:34 - 1:01:41
Follow us on Instagram at yesterdaypod. And please subscribe and leave a review if you liked it on your preferred podcast platform.
1:01:41 - 1:01:50
And if you didn't, please don't. Thank you, David. Have a lovely time doing whatever you're going to do now.
1:01:50 - 1:01:53
And we'll chat next week. I'm going to do a lot of things now, Max.
1:01:53 - 1:02:10
I'm going to do a lot of things. Good.