0:00 - 0:11
Podcasts, there are millions of them. Some might say too many. I have one already.
0:11 - 0:20
I don't have any, because there are enough. Politics, business, sport, you name it, there's a podcast about it, and they all ask the big questions and cover the hot topics of the day.
0:20 - 0:25
But nobody is covering the most important topic of all. Why is that? Are they scared?
0:25 - 0:34
Too afraid of being censored by the man? Possibly, but not us. We're here to ask the only question that matters.
0:34 - 0:38
We try and say it at the same time, Max. What did you do yesterday?
0:38 - 0:44
What did you do yesterday? That's it. All we're interested in is what the guests got up to yesterday, nothing more.
0:44 - 0:51
Day before yesterday, Max? Nope. The greatest and most interesting day of your life? Unless it was yesterday, we don't want to know about it.
0:51 - 1:13
I'm Max Rushden. And I'm David O'Doherty. Welcome to What Did You Do Yesterday? Welcome to this episode of Midweek Mayhem, series one of Midweek Mayhem, because there was no series one of Midweek Mayhem in the original series one of What Did You Do Yesterday?
1:13 - 1:25
David O'Doherty is here as an important clarification. Do you think we should do prequels of Midweek Mayhem, where we go back and try and remember what we were doing on the various yesterdays?
1:25 - 1:40
Yeah. Mrs. Rushden had an idea, which is you could do nostalgia episodes. Where you ask the guest, what is your dream day to have recorded What Did You Do Yesterday when something actually happened yesterday?
1:40 - 1:54
I mean, it does raise an interesting thought, which is with, say, your photos, all of my photos since 2008 are all on my phone.
1:54 - 2:00
Yeah. And I can go back to pretty much any day in the last 17, 18 years.
2:00 - 2:05
Yeah. I'm not going to remember everything that happened, but I'll be like, oh, that and that.
2:05 - 2:09
You know, the past isn't as much of a mystery as it used to be.
2:09 - 2:14
No. So we could do, let's look at your photos from the 18th of December, 2013.
2:14 - 2:18
Well, I'll tell you why I would remember that, because it's my birthday. I know.
2:18 - 2:25
Well, I didn't know, but it was a 1,365 guess and I got it. Are you the sort of guy who remembers birthdays?
2:25 - 2:33
No. I remember Teddy Sheringham's birthday is April the 30th. I'll tell you what I had.
2:33 - 2:45
I had someone bought me a Cliff Richard calendar of 1993, to be ironic. And then I just kept it on my wall for years and put everyone's birthdays in.
2:45 - 2:49
And it was really incredibly useful, even if the days didn't tally. Oh, yeah, yeah.
2:49 - 3:02
June 1993, Cliff Richard is sitting cross-legged and the photo is from above and he is on a blue tennis court and he is sort of, raising his hands to the Lord, I think.
3:02 - 3:11
Well, yeah. That is the most memorable. If anyone else still has the 1993 Cliff Richard calendar, let me know the other months.
3:11 - 3:17
I remember those calendars because he was a man not afraid to take his shirt off into his seventies.
3:17 - 3:29
Not at all. Yeah, I know. And he didn't have the little, you know, the way sometimes dudes, even Cliff develop little boobies, little kind of squidgy boobies.
3:29 - 3:37
Yeah. Boobies like eggs. They're more like sort of long strings, aren't they? It will happen to all of us, apart from Iggy Pop.
3:37 - 3:42
There's a sort of long. Yeah. Spaghetti is too much. Yeah. But sort of a linguine.
3:42 - 3:49
That's what you'll get. Yeah. They're like Joanne McNally's eggs. That's what they're like. Just some feedback.
3:49 - 3:54
Hang on. Because you've raised an interesting point there. Iggy Pop's in good nick. Okay.
3:54 - 4:01
As is Anthony Kiedis. Kiedis from the Red Hot Chili Peppers. Yes. His physio did my knee.
4:01 - 4:08
Anthony Kiedis' physio. Yeah. Physio'd my knee. Yeah. Max. So they're both in good nick.
4:08 - 4:15
I think partly because they perform shirtless on stage. Do you think we should podcast shirtless?
4:15 - 4:23
No. But I think for the live shows. Yeah. We should insist on it. For us, the guests, and the entire audience.
4:23 - 4:31
Will that mean we'll resell more or fewer tickets if that was the case? Some feedback.
4:31 - 4:42
We got a lot of feedback about Phil Wang's personal training. Yeah. On Instagram, a lot of people below the little clip that was put out of Phil Wang talking about his personal trainer not being able to count.
4:42 - 4:54
MJTBell says, I'm a personal trainer, and it's true. PTs can't count. And then Hooper said, I'm also a personal trainer and can confirm that I can't count either.
4:54 - 4:59
And then Instafran94 said, I once had a personal trainer who didn't know how many seconds.
4:59 - 5:14
We're in a minute. What? I mean, I realize you may not have the answer to this, but why did we go for the 60 seconds in a minute?
5:14 - 5:21
Whereas everything else in our society is arranged around tens, Max. Why isn't there 10 hours in a day?
5:21 - 5:29
Why isn't there 100 seconds in a minute? And should we be the ones to try and change the world?
5:29 - 5:40
It really works with, no, I was about to say it works with the sun coming up and going down, but it doesn't because that does change during the year, doesn't it?
5:40 - 5:50
It's a good question. The only thing I can think of is, this is not answering your question, and I may have brought this up before, but the former Welsh centre forward,
5:50 - 5:58
Robbie Earnshaw, who came on my radio show on Saturday and I called him Robbie and someone said, why are you calling him Robbie?
5:58 - 6:07
He's Robert. And I was like, am I being? Are we friends? And he said, well, I'll tell you what, I'm on the way to the hospital because my wife is about to be induced to have a baby and I've stopped
6:07 - 6:12
for 10 minutes to you to talk about Nottingham Forest's form. So I was like, I don't think that was the right choice, Robbie.
6:12 - 6:25
But anyway, he once tweeted, how do we know today is Sunday? What if the person who first said it just said it was Sunday and actually it might not be Sunday after all?
6:25 - 6:32
And I can't answer that question. It's a classic philosophy. Philosophical. Why are things called things?
6:32 - 6:42
Yeah. Now that said, we're locked into there being 365 days because that's to do with the earth spinning around as it does a lap of the sun.
6:42 - 6:53
So that is set in stone. However, what I am suggesting, and I would like any listeners to pick me up on this, why not have 10 months?
6:53 - 7:05
So we divide three. So each month has 36 days. Yeah. There's 10. There's 10 hours within that, each of which has 100 minutes, and every minute is 100 seconds.
7:05 - 7:14
Okay. That's all I'm saying. Yeah, but hang on. If then someone says to Phil Wang, a minute of press-ups, it's just much harder.
7:14 - 7:23
Maybe that's why. Here it is. 7.12 p.m. on the 17th of May, 2020, Robert Earnshaw tweeted, there is zero evidence that today is Sunday.
7:23 - 7:29
We're all kind of relying on the fact that somebody has kept an accurate count since the first one ever.
7:29 - 7:39
You can't argue with that, Robert Earnshaw. I can't argue with it. Like, you sort of think, that's a silly thing to tweet, and then you think, I can't argue.
7:39 - 7:50
I can't argue with it. Also, congratulations to Mr. and Mrs. Earnshaw. Congratulations, yeah. On weighing spaghetti, C-I-A-N, C-I-A-N?
7:50 - 8:01
How am I pronouncing that? C-I-A-N. C-I-A-N. Yep. C-I-A-N says, hi, Max and David. I was always told that 75 grams of pasta was a regular serving, always telling you this.
8:01 - 8:12
I just checked the pack of Little Fusilli in my press, and it says that a 500-gram pack contains six servings, which is approximately 83 grams.
8:12 - 8:29
Phil Wang is moaning about eating a normal-sized pasta serving. Wow. No, he's not, because like many of the listeners, and I regard myself as both a listener and a partaker in what you did yesterday, I weighed 80,
8:29 - 8:36
80 grams of pasta. Did you? Yes. And then I added another 40 to make a portion.
8:36 - 8:51
Did you weigh it in the way that Del McG told us to, which was to place an empty pint glass or other tall glass on your kitchen scale, reset it to zero?
8:51 - 8:57
You know those magazines like Pick Me Up and Take a Break? Yeah. And they have a tips page that viz top tips is a rip-off.
8:57 - 9:02
Yeah. That's now what we're doing. Which is how to weigh spaghetti. You are listening to this.
9:02 - 9:07
You're actively chosen to download a podcast where two men are telling you how to weigh spaghetti.
9:07 - 9:11
Yeah. Pint glass. Pint glass. You put it on the scale. You set it to zero.
9:11 - 9:18
Then you put your spaghetti into the upright glass. Have a cry that you're having to weigh spaghetti, then cook it.
9:18 - 9:25
And you did send this to Phil Wang, didn't you? Yes. And he responded positively because we don't know the exact system Wang was using.
9:25 - 9:30
I suspect Wang just has one scales in his house and it's the scales. That he weighs himself on.
9:30 - 9:40
He holds the spaghetti in his hands like this and then subtracts his body weight from the spaghetti to calculate exactly how much spaghetti he's holding.
9:40 - 9:47
I mean, this is a much better system with the pint glass. Ian Bergen got in touch, David, and I'm reticent to go down this avenue.
9:47 - 9:56
But at some point during the Phil Wang episode, we were discussing him weighing himself and whether he would weigh himself before or after a movement.
9:56 - 10:08
Oh, yeah. Ian Bergen has, has messaged me on X to say, as someone who weighs themselves every morning, I can confirm that an average movement is around 0.3 kilos.
10:08 - 10:15
Wow. Which I presume now we should refer to as one Ian Bergen. It's one Ian Bergen.
10:15 - 10:21
He has sent for context a list of 14 things that weigh the same. Would you like all of them?
10:21 - 10:25
Well, I did speculate that it's possible a turd weighed a stone. Yeah, that's not.
10:25 - 10:36
Because I never weighed one. I think I did. Take that back then. But yeah, the spotter is on deck looking for the Ian Bergens floating through the night of the Titanic.
10:36 - 10:43
So he went on to chat GPT, which I've never used. And he got the following things that weigh the same as an Ian Bergen.
10:43 - 10:53
A standard coffee mug, a can of soda, a medium-sized apple, a small loaf of bread, a 300-gram pack of butter.
10:53 - 11:06
Well, I mean, obviously a 300-gram. A TV remote control, a small Bluetooth speaker, gaming controller, a paperback book, a large notebook or journal, a pack of 100 A4 sheets, a lightweight jacket,
11:06 - 11:18
a small candle in a glass jar, a small indoor pot plant. Depending on soil and pot size, small plants are about 300 grams.
11:18 - 11:27
Many decorative candles weigh around this much. So, I mean, Ian Bergen could pass any of those things, as could Phil, as could all of us, but there we are.
11:27 - 11:38
A lightweight jacket is the... It's the most disturbing one to imagine passing, or maybe 100 sheets of A4, because I imagine they're coming out like a photocopy machine.
11:38 - 11:52
You just don't want a paper jam. That's all. So you're really just hoping that someone in a boiler suit has to turn up and, like, pull out something and then shove it back in.
11:52 - 12:00
Hugh says, Phil Wang episode, great listen this morning, and he says this, however, what squirrels does Max know Squirrels don't hibernate for six months.
12:00 - 12:06
Squirrels don't hibernate at all. Squirrels hibernate. Do they not hibernate? No, I backed you up on that.
12:06 - 12:14
Thank you, David. They gather the nuts. Right. But then it'd be foolish having gathered them to then just go and sleep beside them for six months.
12:14 - 12:22
They famously trot around the park. You've been gone too long, Max. You only know the ways of the possum now.
12:22 - 12:35
I have so many nuts. I now can sleep. Listener Becky Fox got on to me because she was angry because I said a fox was an untrustworthy animal to base an energy company on.
12:35 - 12:44
Like Fox Energy or whatever would be ripping you off at every turn. And I would like to apologize to her for implying.
12:44 - 12:51
Oh, I see. Because of her name. Yeah. What's the deal with those names? Sounds like your first ever stand-up.
12:51 - 13:00
What's the deal with names, eh? What about that? Names. Deal. If you're called Fox, what does that imply?
13:00 - 13:06
Like I get if you're called Archer, you know, one of your ancestors, whatever. Fletcher.
13:06 - 13:14
I mean, these are mostly archery-based names. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Arrowsmith. Yeah. Crossbow Man.
13:14 - 13:28
Crossbow Sons. The famous Norwegian Crossbow Sons. Mr. Quiver. Good one. Good Quiver there. John says, Hi guys, I'm enjoying the pod greatly.
13:28 - 13:33
I can't report. That I do favor the What Did You Do Yesterday midweek mayhem as opposed to the guest content.
13:33 - 13:38
Yes. Weird. A little while ago, you wanted to find out if everyone was aware of Obelix from Asterix.
13:38 - 13:44
Of course I know your secret. And that this is actually a racket to increase the family business, is what he says.
13:44 - 13:50
As a child of the 80s, I grew up with audio tapes of said diminutive gore constantly playing.
13:50 - 13:58
What? And whose dulcet baritone voice was the narrator for the majority of these? None other than one Willie Rushden Senior, my grandfather.
13:59 - 14:06
I'm sure after your shameless plug the other week, your shares in old cassette tapes have skyrocketed, even though they can all be found on YouTube.
14:06 - 14:10
Whatever next, you're going to break out into a game of Mornington Presents. Love the pod, John.
14:10 - 14:19
So who knew? It's passed me by entirely, the Asterix and Obelix thing. I do remember it from school.
14:19 - 14:34
Maybe I went more in a Smurfs direction of continental European cartoons and stories. My friend Fraser at his, Nativity was the Smurf DJ, which is my favorite Nativity character to have been invented.
14:34 - 14:40
What? Do you not remember in the stable, the Smurf DJ cracking out the hits?
14:40 - 14:47
Joseph would say, have you got living on a prayer? And the Smurf DJ would look through his vinyl and then he'd just get it out and play it.
14:47 - 14:54
So they just added in tons and tons more characters then. I think that's what happens.
14:54 - 14:58
Yeah. You know, it's more creative than just extra trees. This was many years ago.
14:58 - 15:04
Like, he's 45 now. I suspect he hasn't appeared in a nativity for some time, but you know.
15:04 - 15:10
Yeah. Rob Causton, friend of mine says, I can confirm David has only experienced, this is on the bin collections of Edinburgh.
15:10 - 15:23
Of course it is. The authority issue. David has only experienced fringe Edinburgh, which ironically mostly exists in a square mile in the city centre.
15:23 - 15:32
Big bins exist there for retail and to service the many tenement flats. I have normal bins living one mile from the centre of town.
15:32 - 15:42
David would have also experienced bin Geddon in 2022 or 23 when the bin people went on strike and there were lots of rats.
15:42 - 15:50
There were. Yeah. Just piles and piles of reeking bin everywhere. I still stand by.
15:50 - 16:00
It's the best system for bins. Are there listeners from around the world? What are your bin systems?
16:00 - 16:09
Oh, my God. The guy who's just said he prefers this to asking exciting guests what they did yesterday is eating his words.
16:09 - 16:14
The quality control where a message that simply says I have normal bins gets through.
16:14 - 16:25
We don't weed that out. I'll have an apology to everybody because on the Joe McNally episode, when she went to have a haircut, I said, this is the first haircut we've ever had.
16:25 - 16:32
And Rosalyn, amongst others, said first haircut. Who can forget Richard Osmond's daddy-daughter home-based haircut?
16:32 - 16:38
And absolutely right. I'm sorry about that. Oh, yeah. That's an apology. Also, the squirrels.
16:38 - 16:43
You need to apologize to the squirrels as well. Oh, yeah. Apologize to the squirrels.
16:43 - 16:55
I thought that forever. Should we do the cheese game? Last week, you just threw in there at some point you'd lost all of your passwords for all of your online accounts ever.
16:55 - 17:00
Did we get to the bottom of that? The thing is, I just can't. I can't log out of anything ever now.
17:00 - 17:12
There are some things I just don't know. I just don't think I know my Apple ID and I can't shut down the computer or update it to, you know, osmosis 58 or whatever the next download is because
17:12 - 17:15
then it will make me do my Apple ID and then we are. I'm screwed.
17:15 - 17:28
So I'm stuck on this shit. Wow. It reminds me of a dull version of Speed, the movie, whereby we can never end this podcast because then.
17:28 - 17:35
And you'll need to remember your password to send the wee transfer of the audio over or whatever.
17:35 - 17:42
Hey, so it's still a three cheese board. Welcome everybody to Curdle. What did you do fondue yesterday?
17:42 - 18:08
Masterrind. Five. Four. Three. Two. One. Oh, no. Cheese. This is cheese. Oh, no.
18:08 - 18:16
Cheese. This is cheese. Oh, no. Cheese. This is cheese. Oh, no. Cheese. This is cheese.
18:16 - 18:24
Oh, no. Cheese. This is cheese. Oh, no. Cheese. This is cheese. Oh, no. Cheese.
18:24 - 18:40
This is cheese. Oh, no. Cheese. Cheese. we've got two bits of exciting news as the format evolves into its inevitable final form as the replacement for pointless in the daytime tv quiz schedule yes firstly this is
18:40 - 18:50
mars bar i'm reading this for the first time i'm learning this when you are and when the listener is you will find the latest game board pinned to the top of our instagram page wow great at
18:50 - 19:03
yesterday pod so you can keep up to date with the status of the game hey we laughed 2 000 people downloaded a pdf of tom rosa's day there are people that will be excited about this news yes
19:03 - 19:15
over 2000 i've downloaded a picture of a nappy with a poop edit among other pictures we got some criticism you see the thing about curdle master rind is what did you fondue yesterday
19:15 - 19:28
yeah is that they're just normal cheeses yet people were like can we get a list of all of the cheeses that have been guessed already yeah and to those people i say simply go
19:28 - 19:40
back and listen to all of the previous episodes of this podcast here's the thing in the description of the post that is pinned you will also find all the old and incorrect cheese guesses so you can
19:40 - 19:58
keep track of everything that has been unsuccessfully guessed so far secondly we received our first ever cheese board submission via the post and the po box address kim and mo are you joking what it sent us via royal mail a
19:58 - 20:09
five-star submission complete with handcrafted gold stars and miniature cheese models i'm worried about the pair of you but i also love you dear david and max kim and mo here two women who share
20:09 - 20:23
a love of the what did you do yesterday kim living in manchester mo living near holmforth in yorkshire we wanted to enter curdle Masterrind what did you fondue yesterday competition but finding it difficult to leave a five-star review as we don't own iphones we listen on
20:23 - 20:41
spotify on our android phones mrs Rushden had this problem as well if you remember i said she couldn't guess until she submitted a five-star review this is not a criticism of mrs Rushden but she has taken to responding under some of our posts with guests
20:41 - 20:57
she would like and tagging those guests in it yes she also richard herring i'm working on herring we're at a very tense point in the negotiations here right okay ukraine america russia style yeah and bloody mrs
20:57 - 21:10
Rushden comes in like the prince salman and just starts reading out new demands then so you get geopolitics of this yes you do see the thing is because i told her to leave a five-star
21:10 - 21:22
review now tioni actually now talks to me in sort of underneath my posts on social media anyway here is their guess they say we both love the pod from the start mo favors listening while
21:22 - 21:32
out walking kim can give no greater compliment than to say she enjoys the pod so much she can use it to get to sleep and has promoted you to conscious daytime listening only amazing wow yes
21:32 - 21:48
keep up the cheesetastic work okay so here is the guest you want to do the or not i'll say good luck kim and mo i should be able to hold myself back whenever you tell a really good joke i just go yep that
21:48 - 21:55
was good but when you do a bedoing yeah you've got me here we go cashel blue
21:57 - 22:17
there you go bing bing bing bing bing hundred percent so far they're just normal cheeses compter oh bing so it's right wrong place right cheese wrong place wow we're getting somewhere yeah breeder moe right irish porter cheddar
22:17 - 22:32
okay so we have a three cheese board but we know compter is coming in fourth or fifth place this is like a real breakthrough mars bar says we will now be accepting cheese game submissions from any
22:32 - 22:43
source once again not just five star itunes reviews because we've just had too many five star reviews now well and it's starting to look a bit suspicious it can't be this good tim cook
22:43 - 22:56
was on to mars bar being like you've made a mockery of my beloved star system on my app store who's yesterday is it it's terrible news david it's my yesterday it's your yesterday now i'm
22:56 - 23:12
here to support you thank you problem is we've recorded this on a tuesday quite a few times now so i am pretty much familiar with your monday i think this is the third monday this is basically
23:12 - 23:23
groundhog day now for everyone i think and like i can't lie about what happened during the day right no there are some things that are slightly different many things are the same you could guess
23:23 - 23:32
quite a lot of them but do you want me to start at the beginning i think we should all lean into this i'll just be taking this out of the listeners okay it's going to be as much a
23:32 - 23:48
checklist as a what did you do yesterday so at 5 30 yeah willie roshden woke up asked if he could come in was told it's not six o'clock yet at 601 he came in and was given a surprise
23:48 - 24:01
for not coming in till six is that the start pretty good 550 it's ian willie's still only five all right so you know ian wakes up that feels like with a day start so as usual it's given me
24:01 - 24:15
a maximum of five hours broken sleep because of when radio finished on a sunday night i go and get in two puzzles one is a sort of 3d it's got a fire engine on the top ambulance below it police
24:15 - 24:32
car helicopter and i give him the clock you can take all the numbers out it's like a wooden clock last week you gave him the gift of time i did yeah albeit a clock that didn't work that he put in a ziploc bag and carried around
24:32 - 24:44
with him yeah yeah i can't believe he's still carrying it around a week later that has gone into the landfill of time so 10 minutes that's 10 to i go back to bed thinking ah he might just
24:44 - 24:54
play with those on his own forever six on the dot he comes in to get me so i say right let's go into the living room and we're going to watch a tv show we've just started called number blocks
24:54 - 25:12
oh yeah do you want to hear the theme tune yes one two three four five number blocks six seven eight nine ten number blocks one and another one is two and another one is me that's three five four three two one number
25:12 - 25:25
five number blocks you're a number block let's play number blocks i've in the last bit i don't know yet but that's sort of how it goes it doesn't seem like an exciting idea for a show like in the past he's enjoyed tractor ted which is classic
25:25 - 25:35
life on the farm yeah yeah yeah it's animated there's like two little ones running around if they jump into each other they become a two they become a different character imagine it's good
25:35 - 25:47
for maths i don't know yeah but it's good for him sitting quietly on a sofa let's be honest about this if the ones bump into each other there is a gestation period of nine months
25:47 - 26:02
it's really boring and then you watch them go to the scan and then you watch them like 12 weeks in go on facebook and put like a picture of the scan and then like about seven months in one
26:02 - 26:13
of the ones is like in a black and white photo holding their pregnant belly you know blessed in the past when people have put up the photo of the scan on social media yeah it does sometimes
26:13 - 26:32
look like the satellite picture when there's a storm coming in you know when they do it during the winter and you're like uh-oh batten down the hatches i always feel like responding also i've started like a google doc for him where he can just type letters and numbers
26:32 - 26:50
and i started calling it let's do business and now he says let's do some business and i say yeah let's do some business and the irony is neither of us know what business is i'm also like i'm doing business this is as businessy as my life gets
26:50 - 27:01
but we sit there we do some business we write out his name we write out mama dada his friend's name sometimes we just type lots of letters and numbers and then delete them
27:01 - 27:13
does remind me a bit of my detective agency era where now granted i was like eight or nine where we were struggling to get cases so we would get like mortgage applications and forms from the bank
27:13 - 27:24
and then just take them back and fill them in for hours we have had quite a lot of detective correspondence i don't know why i haven't read it out i don't know why i have normal bins was above
27:25 - 27:33
the pecking order because these are really quite good so i will promise to do them next week okay so then while we're doing that at some point i'm watching spurs bournemouth and many night arsenal
27:33 - 27:44
and just sort of you know in a bit of the a league style i'm just trying to do a bit of that yeah jamie makes me three slices of toast now sometimes quite often she spreads the toast so i just get
27:44 - 27:54
delivered could be toast and butter peanut butter peanut butter and jam this time it's a choose your own adventure oh cool spreads are there it's for me to choose yeah so i like to go straight in with toast and butter and just
27:54 - 28:04
start eating that because i like my toast hot so like one is just like get the butter on it and start eating it start enjoying the feeling of the toast question while i'm thinking about what else
28:04 - 28:18
i'm going to put on the toast yes david what shape does she cut the toast into oh no these are just three slices all big full slices of sliced bread toast no what do you mean what do you mean like
28:18 - 28:30
i prefer a triangle or a quadrant yeah or a soldier maybe you want your toast cut into soldiers before you spread it with peanut butter no no no no no no post
28:30 - 28:40
post right i've just got three toasted it's not on a toast rack but if you're a b&b and someone put the toast right down it's for me to choose what to do so i could cut it into triangles
28:40 - 28:54
she's left that to me she's given me the free will to do that so hang on has she also brought over peanut butter jam nutella butter it's on the kitchen table jam peanut butter butter there
28:54 - 29:06
they're my choices okay yeah so i do one butter yeah one peanut butter yeah and then one peanut butter and jam i eat them in the process of least to most exciting culminating in peanut butter and
29:06 - 29:24
jam i do hear phil wang's personal trainer being infuriated here i'd say that's probably 80 grams of pasta right there what are you gonna do about it fortunately philip with an f was not there failing to count in my kitchen
29:24 - 29:38
i do really want to go on a health journey and i wonder if i will slowly be influenced by all your boring friends into like going on a health journey but i really love peanut butter yeah and
29:38 - 29:54
it is something you hear with the miraculous weight loss drugs of our time that to miss out though on the joy of having three slices of toast you know where you not to feel like eating it i do still very much
29:54 - 30:07
enjoy that me and the helen copter would be more bagel type people really interesting i find often a bit too much dough that's part of the unhealthy joy of it i guess that's fine it's a public holiday
30:07 - 30:23
here's a curveball i don't cycle to south yarrow i get in the subaru yeah because also it's 35 degrees yeah so i listened to about two minutes of something serious whatever it is alistair campbell's
30:23 - 30:34
on it yeah normally i'd listen to that but i can't be bothered so i go to fern cotton sounds of the 90s and i presumably listen to innie camozzi and think i like that replay that loudly
30:34 - 30:46
and i enjoy the freedom of being alone with me and innie camozzi in the subaru driving to south yarrow your dream would be if alistair campbell got rid of rory stewart and replaced him with
30:46 - 31:07
fern cotton yeah and so they would have mark carney the new prime minister of canada on and alistair campbell would ask him a question about the financial crush and then fern cotton would play marilyn manson don't speak by no doubt go back to your mansions whatever that's like
31:07 - 31:28
don't give up you've got the music in you that's exactly right uh do you like elastica mark yeah good right i'm early so i go to a nice time you know i am intrigued with this because yeah i'm not going to say we don't do
31:28 - 31:40
much work for these ones max but it's fun it comes easily let's put it that way yeah whereas for your a league podcast with archie thomas and thomas sorenson yeah is that their names
31:40 - 31:57
archie thompson but close enough you presumably have to stay up with what's happening to the west coast mariners this month or this week yeah i do have to have watched at least the highlights of the football matches yeah that seems like a prerequisite
31:57 - 32:09
to do a show about football matches i don't need to have watched the highlights of my yesterday before doing this like i'm experiencing them i did at the end of the day think about what
32:09 - 32:18
happened yeah just so i could you know remember it but yeah i mean the beauty of this pod for guests is there's no prep sure and i think they like that yeah anyway so i go into the office
32:18 - 32:34
once i've done that work and no thomas sorenson what so uh he is replaced by macedonia's finest norm sekulovsky yes who would like to be known as batka he's a funny guy good guy yeah another goalkeeper uh no right back right back for
32:34 - 32:44
perth glory back in the 90s right now you're not going to believe this the boss david says what's everyone's coffee orders okay yeah i really walk him through it i walk him through
32:44 - 33:02
it he writes it down ah so let me try and just so you want a mug a cup not filled to the top yeah but with very hot flat white is that your order strong strong half full
33:02 - 33:16
flat white now interestingly in this cafe they have small and large cups you'll remember denmark's third greatest goalkeeper thomas sorenson brought me a large and i was disappointed okay so i said
33:16 - 33:26
to david look i'd like a strong small flat white make it half full because they always overfill it they're going to overfill it so if you say half they can't go above three quarters because they're
33:26 - 33:36
not mad these people does seem to me maybe a running theme between personal trainers and baristas with numbers and fractions and these kind of things we should investigate it further
33:36 - 33:52
on a later episode so i say this and i say small strong flat white half full he returns with six coffees there are five small cups and he hands me the large cup and i genuinely think it's a gag
33:52 - 34:00
because we've had the thomas sorenson i wasn't quiet about thomas sorenson gave me the wrong coffee to the point where i think thomas was a bit like come on mate you know yeah i'm the third
34:00 - 34:10
best goalkeeper denmark's ever produced i've got your coffee you'll enjoy it but i'm serious about this because every coffee matters and i'm aware it appears that this issue that i have does not
34:10 - 34:22
paint me in a great light shit and i trust me i'm a really nice guy what about when your arm goes out and sweeps the six coffees off the table directly into the
34:22 - 34:31
faces like literally it wasn't even like he wrote it down i was like you wrote it down what's happened here and everyone is laughing because they were all there for thomas sorenson game i'm
34:31 - 34:41
like i'm being trolled now you know and i try and drink it but it tastes like a babyccino right there's just too much milk in it so i can't drink it so then i'm very apologetic because i'm like
34:41 - 34:51
i'm really sorry i don't want this coffee he said let me go back and get you another one i'm like you can't go back and get me another one i refuse he's the boss i'm just not gonna drink this coffee i put it in his eyeline fuck
34:52 - 35:04
i didn't think it was like this i thought it was more just a sort of a eye roll this is like you know the annoying kid at the birthday party who when someone puts salt on the mcdonald's chips
35:04 - 35:16
won't eat them then that's basically you what it is is i'm gonna have two coffees in a day and they really matter to me yeah so i'm gonna get it right and if it means waiting i'd rather
35:16 - 35:27
wait but they're this fundamentally the same can you not just wait for the milk to go down a bit no no it's not foamy it's basically a mug of milk when you come back to the uk yeah you
35:27 - 35:42
are in for a rude awakening with all of this posy bullshit it's okay because the only cafes i go to in east london are run by australians it's fine okay anyway it's funny you know inside very upset
35:42 - 35:57
but on the outside i'm doing it in i think i'm doing it with a soft touch that's what i think this is what assholes always think so anyway we do the show and everyone thinks i'm an absolute twat obviously
35:57 - 36:09
yeah there's probably a whatsapp group where i'm not in it where they talk about my coffee the show's fun show's good fun right great is there any big incidents did anyone jump into
36:09 - 36:21
the crowd and two-footedly dive on a supporter any big stuff like that no no you know it was like a pretty humdrum weekend of a league football i would suggest love it but you know
36:21 - 36:35
lots of good youngsters playing there's a really good football culture here they're all just so terrified that it's not as amazing and so they panic and you know everybody keeps trying to say everything's amazing and you can't bullshit your fans if a game's bad you say it's bad
36:35 - 36:44
and if it is a bad game a football fan isn't going to go hang on that game was bad maybe i'll never like football again like don't have all fans thing it's like it's okay some premier league
36:44 - 36:56
games are bad it's fine yeah yeah i have to do a shop on the way home oh i stop at woolworths which is not the same as a uk woolworths it's not just cola fizzy lances and smash x magazine
36:56 - 37:09
1994 it's an actual supermarket and actually i'd say the nicest one in australia and then you go to comet to get the new top loader and these records and i buy a poster from a female
37:09 - 37:21
sony's got a lovely layout and i get lots of stuff and then i'm at the checkout and you know i've got my headphones in rude and i don't go to the checkout i go
37:21 - 37:28
to one with a person a because there's not a lot of queue and i hate the weighing bit you know unnecessary item in the bagging area or whatever that really just you know i just
37:28 - 37:38
can't bear that anyway so i take a ear pod out because that's polite and she says how's your day so i say oh it's okay my mind how's your day and she's getting off at four but she really wants to
37:38 - 37:50
do this shift you know you get paid more on a bank holiday to do the shift i'm like that's interesting chat chat chat chat chat this is why you're such a good interview you go straight in you're like what are you on sundays is double
37:50 - 38:00
what about rome christmas what about day after christmas what about a new year's day anyway the difficulty is at some point i can't remember how we get on to it but she just says yeah like everyone
38:00 - 38:13
except americans because they're all stupid i'm like oh god i can't face lazy stereotypes anymore you know there was a time maybe i'd have gone oh yeah yeah they are stupid so i just completely
38:13 - 38:25
shut down i just say i don't generalize and i'm just like i'm like you've lost me i'm afraid and i really wanted to say my parents are american or just something but i just didn't quite have that
38:25 - 38:38
in me i just was like you don't know me what are you doing there's no need for this we won't inquire into it but all the listeners and i were just all thinking at the moment how'd you get on to this
38:38 - 38:49
you were like what countries do you hate of all the customers here i don't know i can't remember how it came up and i wasn't really paying a whole lot of attention because a i was on the clock sure
38:50 - 39:00
has two children at home then i sort of went okay and i walked off thinking i'm pleased that i blanked shut off because there's no time for this kind of lazy stereotypes these days i just thought i did
39:00 - 39:13
a good thing but i felt impolite so i was slightly conflicted but it was okay yeah also i would imagine the woolworths in wherever you are in melbourne doesn't get a huge number of americans
39:13 - 39:35
coming through you know what i mean it's weird the three people behind me all had stetsons and rude awakening after i'd bagged up my shopping one man was yelling a rootin tootin he was using a whip to get all his goods and wares i needs me some sarsaparilla
39:35 - 39:54
yeah this day is interesting because just the slight variation of it being a bank holiday means that you haven't sent ian off to kindy no he's not a kinder but we have got sophie to babysit we've got sophie doing some
39:54 - 40:09
babysitting yeah okay it's fine that finishes at midday so i don't reap the benefits so i'm sad about that but it's helpful for jamie which i guess is important jamie if you have anything to say about that you can also just comment under any of my instagram posts
40:09 - 40:26
anyway jamie has reheated some meatballs that i'd had my eye on and she's put them in a roll and i've added some mozzarella and cheddar cheese i've had a great lunch as soon
40:26 - 40:44
as i've got in the door great delighted are they meatballs what have you made from a kit therefore they're little cardboard photographs of meatballs with i think these were meatballs that jamie had just made spontaneously yeah i know i know now normally at this time you
40:44 - 40:55
sneak in a little snooze max yeah no time for that well you're gonna push through hang on that's a good question i'm pretty sure that i did get a nap in actually gonna try and raw dog the whole
40:55 - 41:07
day push right through yeah no no no because i think after lunch if she gives me a nap i really owe her for that i'm gonna say she gave me a nap she did because i'm watching my society too ian's
41:07 - 41:19
running around and i know that at 3 p.m i've booked to go to the museum of play and art with ian not just myself i'm booked in yeah so before that i do get a nap in
41:19 - 41:29
i must do the last two days she's given me naps yeah because it's not important for yesterday but today i gave her six or seven a.m and she said thank you for giving me that nap and i said
41:29 - 41:39
that's okay and she went it was very nice of me to give me you naps the last couple of days so she was like it wasn't like that yeah yeah that's transactional it is really it is transactional
41:39 - 41:49
yeah yeah uh anyway so i have a nap i get up but i'm not filled with the sadness that occasionally happens with naps we have received some feedback on that oh yeah which is
41:49 - 42:07
both of us in particular the one where i woke up and felt that couldn't remember who i was because i'd woken up at half eight or something it took a while for the language to load i want to know what happens at the museum of play and art
42:07 - 42:19
yeah mopa it's called so it's been 35 degrees all day and ian and i get to the car and it is baking hot so i throw him in the car and he is not happy about this it feels impolite
42:19 - 42:28
but i get the air con on as quick as i can but it is not enough and i put the music up loud because what you don't want the irony of children is most of the time you want them to go to sleep
42:28 - 42:37
except when you don't want them to go to sleep and when you don't want them to go to sleep they go to sleep so i probably drive for five minutes i get my coffee that i've been waiting
42:37 - 42:48
for since dave the boss didn't get me the right coffee oh god i've got that locked in i'm driving to mopa and he falls asleep i'm like and i'm trying everything music is so loud i'm tickling
42:48 - 43:02
his feet i just can't wake him up right once ever i was in your subaru yeah you gave me a lift back from the city farm i did yeah yeah where we'd had hard eggs yeah the one thing i remember
43:02 - 43:18
about it is it has the normal steering wheel to drive the car yeah but it also i think i was sitting in the back yeah yeah you were in the kid's seat we strapped you in i am a tiny man it
43:18 - 43:29
has a secondary steering wheel then when you can pretend that you're driving the car yeah like the simpsons that's no longer there ian does like car still but it's not there i don't know where it is
43:29 - 43:40
but he's asleep and the car is still really hot but it does mean i can listen to some more sounds of the 90s so i'm we get to mopa and it's nice it's a bit feral because it's a public
43:40 - 43:48
holiday so there's thousands of kids there yes and i really love my own child but i can't be bothered with anyone else's so they're all running around but you know i'm friendly enough i put
43:48 - 44:00
on a front if a little kid comes up what's at this place there's ramps for little lego cars there's a nice slide there's a flying fox you know sort of you can hold on and slide across
44:00 - 44:10
there's some sort of things but you can put plastic balls into tubes and the air sucks them out and they whiz out really fast there's a bit of water play the people who work here the stamina
44:10 - 44:18
they have is wild yeah a very upbeat 25 year old says time for a dance party and all the kids run off and dance to something except it's not like
44:18 - 44:35
those all i'll say is it does have museum in the title yeah it does seem more just like a play place there's a ayy exhibition on human rights abuses in china for some reason they're just not
44:35 - 44:48
all into that that's more of a four plus i guess no it's not a soft play okay yeah because some plays are like it's basically like you just know every disease is in there sure and you have to really like get your game
44:48 - 44:57
face on that's probably like going to war i think there's some areas that are quite chilled out and if he's tinkering around with the car i can just sit but i don't have my phone with me i like to
44:57 - 45:06
be present you see a lot of parents just sit on the phone you think i can't be that person that looks terrible i don't want to be that person this is coming from a man who was watching
45:06 - 45:23
bournemouth playing football on an ipad on his son's head earlier while his son watched cars making love listen we're not consistent in this but you know in public i don't want to be seen like i'm that baron in my house sure i'm doing Squardle right
45:23 - 45:34
in front of him going i don't know i'm trying to get a seven letter word i'm just not happy with the misuse of the term museum here okay i'll have a word can you do that yeah i mean it's a franchise
45:34 - 45:44
now there's two or three of them and they're doing really quite well so it hasn't seemed to have hampered their business but i'll have a word so we do all the things and that's fun and it's
45:44 - 45:51
really nice at the end i say can i just have a glass of water because you sort of forget about home sustenance when you're like giving your child snacks and they say i have a bottle of
45:51 - 46:02
water it's really hot out there so i got a free bottle of water so i was very kind of them wow and then we drive home and i give him his snacks in the car in the hope that he doesn't fall asleep
46:02 - 46:17
and he doesn't fall asleep great so that's good what snacks would you try to keep up he had rich crackers yeah and some like sort of puffs it's probably like a carrot puff something depressing
46:17 - 46:28
yeah okay fine it looks a bit like a crisp sounds like a tom rosenthal dinner it's a tom rosenthal dinner it's divided into little the box is divided he like it yeah and then i give him six pineapples
46:28 - 46:40
i take the grapes off him because they're a bit of a choking hazard and i'd seen a birthday party a kid choking on sausage the day before so slightly scarred by that they're okay and i can't see him
46:40 - 46:53
in the car and also i want some grapes so like it's win-win okay everybody wins i get some grapes yeah choke on the grapes we get home dinner is chicken and potatoes from a box yeah and even i will
46:53 - 47:08
suggest we could have managed this one but it's got a nice sort of sage echelon sauce and you know it's sort of the potatoes you sort of fry them and then put rocket and parmesan over them and it's
47:08 - 47:22
really delicious does it come with a big hat with a fake rat in it so you can pretend you're ratatouille and the chef and then all you do is pour boiling water on it and it just goes
47:22 - 47:34
and suddenly appears i'm a chef look what i've made because the box arrives on a monday we'll have our box of food probably one on a monday one on a wednesday but if you ask me on any other day
47:34 - 47:46
you know we've spent hours slaving away like hugh fernley whittingstall yeah this is not an accurate portrayal of every day of my week real loyal listeners will really know what my monday is
47:46 - 48:04
yeah yeah okay so then ian's in the bath i walk willie around the block in the pram sometimes you carry him sometimes in the pram i go to the drive-through off license that they have in
48:04 - 48:16
australia a big drive-through off licenses but you can walk in with a pram that is one of the bleakest sights in all of australia i get a small bottle of jim beam i sit on the pavement
48:16 - 48:28
in the evening sun and down it and just think about the mistakes i've made in my life i buy some alcohol-free beer and i think this is because of the guests we have and just thinking
48:28 - 48:39
yeah it's a monday i can't start on a monday okay but it's so hot you just need something actually one can of that makes me think okay takes the edge off makes me think i don't need
48:39 - 48:46
six pints of lager which is what i really want to have and then we get to kerry godliman levels by the end of that part you know so it could be good
48:46 - 48:58
for the pod i get home ian's asleep willie's asleep i pass willie to jamie i come into this shed that i'm in right now i record football weekly interruption yes david normally you
48:58 - 49:03
treat yourself to a little kit kat or something like that a little treat i have a kit kat
49:16 - 49:26
great the thing is right we can't right as the pioneers of yesterday yeah we can't change our days because if a guest said oh i don't do this normally no yeah so yeah i have a kit kat chunky
49:26 - 49:38
it's the familiarity that people like when you watch nothing to declare australia you don't expect someone to start singing you know what i mean you want it to be basically the same show
49:38 - 49:51
every time that's what we're doing here that's the service we're providing max so i record football weekly with barry johnny liu and nuradeen chowdhury so that's a good panel great we have a good chat
49:51 - 50:03
about the football love chowdhury yeah yeah good guy and then brush my teeth go to bed yeah the bank holidayness of it bought a free song i was looking forward to the cleaner yeah none of that
50:03 - 50:20
you know no i was looking forward to the library where he raises hell yeah around people trying to do their phds none of that but it didn't need it i enjoyed your yesterday max yeah there's some real consistencies here
50:20 - 50:31
and i agree with you it's only a monday what can you do you can't have a wild monday every day of your life oh i i do i absolutely do okay you can but i can't it had everything that i wanted and
50:31 - 50:45
more i felt like i had a nice day i bought a chainsaw yesterday so i'll just hang that out there as wow yeah if it had been my turn we could have gone in yeah i just wanted to be like elon cutting through the red tape good
50:45 - 50:57
good for you helen copter check this out if this podcast ends because you like go on a murderous spree because it's going quite well i'd have to stop doing it like if you're in prison going can
50:57 - 51:15
i run the prison podcast studio yeah i don't think i could carry on if you'd chainsawed a load of people yeah it would be difficult for us to discuss the sort of mundane things we talk about if i was awaiting trial for having chainsawed like 10 nuns
51:15 - 51:26
yeah but if you're in the prison that would be good you get then i did 50 chin-ups and then i just beat up the biggest guy there to show everyone who's boss and then what would
51:26 - 51:36
happen is there'd be all these prisoners who'd like you could turn their life around by teaching them all the piano yeah there would just be like this phalanx of concert pianists coming out of
51:36 - 51:53
wow dublin penitentiary and you'd be like tim robbins the difficulty would be i'd be plotting an escape obviously yeah but because we don't lie on this podcast you'd be like what did you do between two and
51:53 - 52:06
four and i'd be like i filled my pockets with dust from the tunnel that i'm digging and then i walked around the yard i got through two yards it was a bit tough but i'm getting
52:06 - 52:22
there guys i'm really getting there and you'll never guess what they're cooking the books it is lucky isn't it that tim robbins wasn't recording we've never interviewed him andy dufresne was never a guest on what he did yesterday while he was
52:22 - 52:33
digging that tunnel what a relief hey good it's been a short one we want to make these short so we should go really we should call it a night shouldn't we if you would like to get
52:33 - 52:44
in touch with the podcast and i think you should i do we've raised a lot of very important topics today and we would like your feedback this is how to get in touch
52:44 - 53:01
to get in touch with the show you can email us at what did you do yesterday pod at gmail.com follow us on instagram at yesterday pod and please subscribe and leave a review if you liked it on your preferred podcast platform and if you didn't please don't
53:01 - 53:14
uh yeah please get in touch because we rely on that remember i mean somebody got on this one by just saying i have normal bins so pretty much we're at the stage where we'll read anything thank you david i had a
53:14 - 53:39
lovely time thanks max i had a lovely time i'll talk to you very soon yeah you will hey there i'm keema bob and i have a new podcast it's called icebergs and it's about the endless
53:39 - 53:50
journey to find ourselves and find out what it really means to have self-acceptance and self-love i'll be exploring the inner landscapes of some of my favorite people oh i don't like being self-aware
53:50 - 54:01
and asking them about who they are how they got that way and how they feel about it that's subjective what i do on stage i am objectively not funny off stage a bit of their present i didn't
54:01 - 54:14
know that i was ugly until i was like 16 and record executives told me it a bit of their past i need more time being alone than i thought and how they navigate all that stuff that's definitely
54:14 - 54:29
something i think my therapist would have an opinion on the thing about icebergs is only 10 of them is above the surface 90 we can't even fathom and i think people are a lot like that and if they're not then that's a really dumb name for a podcast